Cappocchino

formspring.me

2011-10-22T12:42:00.001+07:00

Do you know exactly what a McD Grimace is? http://www.formspring.me/povverschka

formspring.me

2011-10-22T12:41:00.001+07:00

Do you know exactly what a McD Grimace is? http://www.formspring.me/povverschka

With Rain at The Goods Dept

2010-12-10T02:26:00.000+07:00

Sent from BlackBerry® on 3

Please, Baby.

2010-12-10T00:44:00.001+07:00

Dating is not sex.

I repeat,
Dating is not sex.

So can you stop staring at me like a hungry wolf that stares at a plumpy sheep?
Sent from BlackBerry® on 3

Sparks

2010-12-09T01:51:00.005+07:00

I have lost my sparks on you. The itsy bitsy essence of life I always had when I'm with you.
You said I'm not supposed to be complaining. Well I believe in love, I believe in us. That is the reason why I need this from you.
Do you remember those times when we play cats and dogs with our ex-lovers? You had me at when we first stared at each other, eye to eye, heart to heart. That's the best sparks I ever had compare to any boys I ever dated with.

I want that sparks back.

Whatever it takes.

Please, enough with the flat life we're living in. We don't even need a marriage to know how dull life can be if you only love one person in your adult life. You and your works and studies, while I'm sitting alone at home; well mostly I have lunch with friends which makes it even more desperate. There's nothing wrong with a little date on weekend right? A little rose on our picnic? A little time for us to cuddle in bed and talk about each other's day? Those little things sparks our relationship. Those little things I need in our boring days.

Start by holding my hand not only because you have to protect me from those bus and cars that could harm me. But also because you miss me. It's even better if it's because you miss holding my firm hand. I would use a hand cream for you if you want me to.
Next thing we know perhaps we're having a dinner not because we're hungry. But because we miss staring deeply into each other's eyes. We missed each other's signature laugh and happy face. We miss something we already see everyday, something we took for granted. Well... I wish we do.

I believe in some ways, you love me with your own way. And I love you with my own way.
Turns out we're dealing with differences, just like regular couples do. You with your "I-don't-wanna-say-I-love-you" thingy, while I'm with my PDA thingy. But I just hope we can find the OUR way. Or the EVERYONE'S way. I know, that we've been dealing with our quirkiness which makes us anything-but-ordinary couple. But, hey, what can a little 'normal' flowers and dinners do harm to us?

Anyway, I have to make a confession to you. The reason why I decided to broke up with you a couple of months ago is because...
I miss our sparks.

Oh I love you. :))

RACOONS! what dya think bout them?

2010-09-13T23:17:00.001+07:00

Raccoon is basically a type of animal which I think closer to me, but second to cats. 'The Painted Eyes' or so they called, live in trees but sometimes they dug out for food from the local trash bin in order to survive. Cute is their natural talent, but apparently they can be one of the scariest animal you've ever met. Aren't they cute and fierce at the same time? And oh, well, they're one of the animals I'd like to meet before I die.

Spit it out. NOW!

Hello La Senza

2010-08-31T16:13:00.002+07:00

I just bought 4 g-strings and I never wear g-strings before so when I finally work on it I will post it again ohmygod I am so nervous I literally nervous afraid that it would be such pain in the ass for real I mean reahhlly.

RACCOONS

2010-08-26T09:05:00.005+07:00

It started when I bought a new Blackberry and decided to put a new BBM avatar and thought about putting pics of weird animals and change it everyday and having a loads of fun laughing at those intriguingly peculiar pics. I know I know, this statement is crazy, please ignore.

Ah well and then my heart chose to google for raccoons.

AH RACCOONS. HOW CUTE AND PECULIAR THEY ARE.

That's just how I begin to use raccoon pics everywhere, well, I might use it here too. I don't know I am more like a cat person but urgh, these raccoons are something something! Ok crazy again, please ignore.

Mm, I don't know what to say. The point is, this is my current hobby woophooooooooo collecting raccoon pics. Since their habitat is not in Asia then it will take years for me to meet em so yyyeah, I lost words.

Anyway, enjoy my new tumblr! Click on the pic, click on the pic! Woawoa-choop-choop!

Haven't updated my blog for months and suddenly new followers?

2010-08-26T08:47:00.001+07:00

Guys, you are so weird. Weird as in following weird girl like me.

What Will A Rabbit Do Without A Rabbit Hole?

2010-06-29T23:35:00.003+07:00

What will a rabbit do without a rabbit hole?
A rabbit won't be happy because a rabbit hole is the source of its happiness.
A rabbit hole is a place where it can feel safe and warm on a windy night.
A rabbit hole is a place where it can raise its family.
A rabbit hole is everything for a rabbit.
That's why, a rabbit hole is very important for a rabbit.
And that's why, there are perfect rabbit holes out there for every rabbits.
But talking about rabbit holes, what will become of a rabbit if it can't be inside a rabbit hole in its lifetime?
Simple answer.
The rabbit will die from loneliness.

For Those Who Feel Like Going Down The Hill

2010-04-15T11:55:00.002+07:00

I don't know why but I've been a very good girl lately. *shows halo*

Hahahaha, noo I'm not trying to change myself into something angelic, no, just no at all. But things haven't gone bad lately for me and my friends. Yes, there are conflicts, but not the kind of conflicts that makes me wanna strive for my friends. Meaning, not the type of fun cat fights.

But some of my friends are having rare troubles happened to them that made them burst into tears a lot. I can't tell you exactly why, but as I know I'm not a girl full of empathy so it's been really hard for me to even try understanding the situation. So here it goes, this is what I really wanna say to you, all of you who's having huge huge troubles that may cause a slight mental breakdown. (I'm reeealllly sorry for my words but then again I was born with less empathy so...)

Whatever happens to you, it already meant to happen. Don't ask the reason why, such as, "God, why does this happens to me?". Because God can answer you right away, "Why not?". This is what real. Everybody WILL have problems in their life. If you know someone who almost never experienced huge problems, you might wanna pinch them asking if they are real humans or not. Because IT'S A TOTAL BULLSHIT. Or, THEY'RE NOT A HUMAN. Anyway, the point is, no one will ever get away with this. But guess what, it's a process for us to be a better human being with a better quality. It's like a final project or a final test that you can't runaway from. But you always learn something afterwards. Well, at least, you know what to do when a test like that come up again someday. On the other hand, someone might having worse trouble than what you had. Like, what you see in the soap operas. Some of the stories are real enough to be experienced by real people. And to think about it, I think you should be grateful for your problems. You should think backwardly. Ok, for example you have a broke-up-with-my-bf-problem. You should think my way, "Well at least, I still have my friends." "At least, it's not a matter of life and death." BE POSITIVE! Don't be emo-ish by thinking that "Oooh God, my life is over..." Nah-ah. Suicide is not the way, dude.

Second, it might be a karma. You might have hurt someone so bad that you deserve this kind of problem. It could be. But if you never hurt someone (alright, you're a saint or something) maybe it's just meant to be happen to you. And as I know, once you cried a lot, you will laugh a lot. This is not a joke. Life is an endless cycle of moments that willl has its ups and downs. Try to think backwardly like I've told you before. When you laugh a lot that you can't stop in a day, will you cry a lot on the other day? It happens a lot to me. And I think it will happens backwardly.

One last thing, if problems strike you endlessly like there's no day without one, what you should do are:

1. Stop complaining. More meditation. Think about what you have done to others. Are you a good citizen? Or are you not?

2. Take all the bitter sweet pills. Remember this: "There will be an answer. Let it be."

3. Don't forget that there will always be spring right after the cold cold winter. Remember that whatever happens, happy ending IS real.

4. Take lessons from what happened. Make sure you're not the donkey who falls twice into the same hole.

And to all of my friends, remember that, if you need help, you can always knock on my door. :)

The Top Of The Pyramid

2010-04-12T05:07:00.001+07:00

4.30 AM, drinking two cups of tea, feeling lonely.

I can imagine how life can be soo awesome by reaching full potential of ourselves. Just like Abraham Maslow said on his Hierarchy of Needs, the top of the pyramid is Self-Esteem. The hardest part to reach, but also the most satisfying part if we can reach it.

It's not something weird if I want it right? I mean, I'm a human. A normal one. Who has needs too just like Maslow
said. But maybe, when Maslow did research on this, nobody ever mentioned to him that if someone wants to reach full potential of himself, he must not dream too big; well at least realistic, and he gotta try harder to get it or we won't get it. This is what youth gets now. Including me and someone out there. Dreaming big and hoping that we can change the world. But the truth is there's always someone better than us out there. And it sucks to know that we're not the best, or we're not good enough to be appreciated. Everybody wants a little something. And nobody wants to go home bare hands. At least being known for good at something is so much better than being unknown.

Therefore, I'm telling this to you. I had this ups and downs before. Always have someone better than me right in front of my face all the time. So I know how that feels. When people appreciated him or her but never me. I know exactly how that feels. It hurts. It sucks. So if you feel that I am getting in your way right now, I will completely back off. And it is my vow. I don't want to be the one who holds you up. You said you're tired of me being in front all the time, so this is it. I won't hold you down anymore.

And I still believe that after all these years, you still have something that I don't. :)

This Is Just A Typical Crossroads You'll Find All The Time

2010-03-29T15:49:00.004+07:00

Do you know how stressful I am lately?

This is actually a life of a 19 years old girl, will be graduating from college soon, and trying to pick the right way for her future.

I'm a diploma student and things been going on lately. Graduation is in months away, final project, choosing the right school after (which I really hope I shouldn't do this because I wanna work and make my own money). And there are paths that I should choose. I don't wanna do this at all, really. If I face a crossroads like this after graduation day, it would be which job will I choose.

1. Parallel Class

University of Indonesia is now opening the parallel class for people who still want to go to school but they are like too old for SNMPTN (it's like a test for public universities. and yes, they have age limit.) and also for people who wants to take a bachelor degree but they don't have time to wake up early. The class starts just as similar as the diploma class. Around 1 PM and mostly ended at 6 PM. What makes me stop thinking about it, is that, first of all, it's really expensive. Rp 11,5 million as the first payment (including the first term tuition fee) and for each term you'll have to pay Rp 8,5 million. I can't even afford my diploma tuition fee right now without help and still I have to pay that? This is crazy. I won't do it at all. Anyway the class is on afternoon too so I can't work at all. I really want to work so I don't have to be a dead meat for my parents anymore. It is the time I do things alone. Okay, the third thing is, because it's reaaaalllly expensive, I have to study Public Relations again which I really hate it and it's making me puke. I like Public Relations better when it comes to marketing. And to get it right, I mean not really PR, but not too marketing as well, I have to major in advertising. Which, they don't have it. But actually, I'm glad that the stress of parallel class is over. I didn't take the test. :)

2. Extension Class

Extension Class is a class for people who needs to finish their bachelor degree and for people who work too. So the class is at night, not really expensive (around Rp 5 million), and I can take the advertising class that I want sooo bad. But, there are rumors that there will be no enrollment for extension class this year. And Monkey's friend, Dicky, who works as a PR in UI, said that the rumors are true. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. Fuck, I really hate University of Indonesia.

3. Work

The first thing in my mind and always will. Say buhbye to college and start to be a grown up. But Monkey doesn't want me to work. IDK why I think this has something to do with him in extension class and not working. Unhappy, it is. :(

4. Get Married

WHAT I'M 19 AND I HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT GETTING MARRIED?????

That is so true, Sister! I know I know this is such a shitty option that for a young girl like me, I have to think about all of the possible option. The problem is, Monkey's mom and aunts already ask me about this thing. "When will you marry him?" "Are you prepared for marriage?" This would be a lot easier if the words came out from my family and not from my family-to-be. What I don't like the most (that Monkey knows best) is I have to wear hijab for the rest of my life if I wanna be with him. Oh NO, I am sooo not prepared for this! I love wearing mini skirts, shorties, and short-length-dresses and I want to wear that white beautiful mini gown for my wedding! I also dreamed to have a beautiful honeymoon just me and my husband on the beach with me wearing bikini!

These babies are fabulous! I want them on my wedding day! :D

Don't they look sweeeeeettt? If I wear hijab, things will turn out differently. :((

Ergh, why does life has to be so unfair? You get the best guy on earth but still you have to 'pay' for it!

So, minus the parallel class, I still have like, 3 more options to go. I don't know which one will I choose and I only have months to prepare for it. Nothing will happen if I don't choose but, I don't like to see my life wasted for nothing. I want to be someone who can do something.

A little help, please?

Home, Love, Family. There Was Once A Time I Must Have Had Them Too.

2010-03-28T23:32:00.004+07:00

Good evening, everyone. I just changed my blog layout have you guys checked it out?

This time I wanna talk about home, love, and family.

Today I just set myself on fire. Talking about my family on my Tumblr with certain type of anger. Yes, I was angry. I still feel unwanted by them in like 19 years. It started with my grandparents still not listening to me on and on and on. They avoid eye contact, and mostly don't seem like they listen to me or even just aware of what I was going to say. They always consider my problem as nothing. Me being sick is nothing. Me not going home for months is surely nothing. I don't know, but I think I am nothing to them. I am nothing to my parents. I am nothing to everyone. And then my cousin read this post on my tumblr and start to defend their thoughts. In which, things are not really what you see. In fact they love you, they are proud of you, and my uncle doesn't hate me. Okay, they love me. But maybe, we have different meaning of love. So, let's talk about love.

Love to me means you really care about someone. Like, if you love your boyfriends, then you'll pay full attention to them. If they're sick you take care of them, if they need someone to talk to you'll talk to them, if they feel scared you hug them, and on and on. It's like a cycle that won't stop. You'll be doing that for like, until you guys break up of course. So that's how I define love. And love is something you should give to someone you care about. Girlfriends and boyfriends can break up. But family don't. The blood ties will always be there no matter how you deny it. So you should take a good care of them. Because no matter what, they are the people who is closest to you than anyone. But love, I don't feel that from them. When I'm sick, they don't take care of me. They take me to the doctor but in the process they yelled at me a lot. Not like any other mother or other father that give their children good advices and make sure they don't catch a cold. No, they don't. I am used to take care of myself alone since I was junior high. When I need someone to talk, they don't even think I am that important. As if I was just a teenager that doesn't have something huge to worry about. Well I'm a human. Anything can happen to me. And when I'm scared, they won't ask about me shivering or crying in the dark. They just don't care. My grandparents don't care about me. So does my parents. I've never feel the love of being touched by them. Being hug. Maybe once in a while, but not like it's being a habit. Those things made me feel really lonely. That's why I write a lot. And get out to get friends who would appreciate me and love me and be my family.

When it comes to home, after not feeling like I have both family and love, I don't feel like I have a place to come home to. Home to me is a place, both literally or in the heart only, where you can feel the love of your family. Where you feel that you're belong in there and everybody just being so nice to you. Home is supposed to be where your family is. But I'm sorry, Mom, Dad, I don't feel that way. Home to me is a place that I rent by now, paid each month, a place where I can feel safe, all alone, and be responsible of what I wanna do. A passive place that where nothing can either love you or harm you, is better than the one who can do both. I came home yesterday, after not going home for almost a month. This one is literally home, the place where my family is. And after all these days, I still can't feel the love. As if they don't miss me, they don't expect me to be here, and still they yelled at me. The term home to me is no longer where I can find my family and being loved at the same time. I don't know, I just, don't wanna go home anymore. Even I feel safer in Monkey's house where everybody loves me. Even his mom understands me better than my family. I just, can't find better parents-in-law-to-be other than Monkey's. I wish when I am graduating, I'll be marrying him soon. I will have the family that I want. No, I will MAKE them. And I will be a verrrry good mother that provides love to her children everyday that they think of me when they think of home.

"Home, love, family. There was once a time I must have had them too. Home, love, family. I will never be complete until I found you." Journey to The Past - OST. Anastasia

And I know I had a home when I was a child. But everything has change. It's okay, not everyone has a happy ending.

Red Eyes

2010-03-28T15:01:00.006+07:00

Cappocchinos!

I was having a hard time yesterday. It's still, until know though. But, it's not as painful as before.

My eyes got red all over. As if I was a bridezilla of the vampires that drank blood, less sleep than before, and these eyes are huge like meatballs popping out of the pocket. Scary.

Started on Saturday, when a friend of mine, Anita Maryanne, got infected by a disease that is called "The Contagious Red Eyes". And she infects the other 6 friends of mine including me, my Monkey, her boyfriend, and Mondo from SORE Band. Mondo still got the red eyes until now, though. Wondering why he doesn't heal the way we do. This is pretty much like REC, only we don't kill each other.

I spend my entire week wearing sunglasses, glasses, and also treating myself with Cendo Xitrol; a medicine for eye inflammation.

To tell you the truth, I've never been sick on the eye like this. And it's really confusing. Though it made me feel that I need to worship God more for making me have this lovely vision of mine that don't need no glasses to see. I love my eyes more than anything.

PS: If you have a friend that's infected by red eyes, stay away from him/her. You can get infected because this disease spread by intimate eye-contact through the air.

What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up?

2010-03-07T23:32:00.005+07:00

Hey everyone, what do you up to today?

I have been really tired lately but I am so happy. I don't know why. I just love working many kinds of things at once and to me, only work for 1 job doesn't mean anything. When I work at something I work because I love it. Because it's my passion and what I wanna live for. I am a dreamer, a visionary, so I always want to live up my dream and make them all come true one by one.

I always wanna work as an artworker. But what kind of art will it be? I don't know. I can do so many kind of arts but I'm never really good at one point. Ok, I can draw, dance, design, creating events, thinking about creative ideas, and writing as well. But those abilities that I have is just a so-so basic level that most advance artworkers will laugh at me for it.

And now I want to live up my dream as a fashion designer. Something that I always wanted back when I was young and somehow I cannot do it because I don't have enough money to go to Esmod although I'm already accepted into that school. And everything just changed a lot once I entered UI. I have lost my wildest creative talents and becoming more and more normal. But at the same time I found other kinds of talents. Well, still, this fashion designing matter is no longer to think about. It's as if it has nothing to do with my future.

My kind of style has always been something vintage, preppy, and perfectly layered.

Ever since I entered UI in Public Relation Diploma, I have another dream. And it's to be a marketer or a brand activator. I saw people, those practitioners that amazed me with their story of being successful. Somehow, they seemed to be such busy people but they enjoyed what their doing. I want to be like them. Successful and happy at the same time for doing what you want to do. By doing each public relations assignments made me realize that being creative is needed for communication strategy and I have what it takes to get an A for those creative assignments. And so I think why shouldn't I change my mind? Why shouldn't I be what I already learnt in college?

Another confusing moment.

Back to right now, this moment, I'm working on my fashion line, Goldilocks And The Party Bears, in order to enhance my talent in fashion designing. I hope that this is something that I can work for in about a year. (Seriously graduating means you got nothing to be worry about no more. No school, no work, unless you go to college again. And I'm preparing myself for it right from now.) Well yeah, I just wanna do what I wanna do during my unemployment time right after graduated. And doing a fashion line seems like a good work. Besides, I always dream about something great to do but never have a courage to move my ass of the couch and start making plans. I never know that forcing yourself to do what you have dreamed gave you something more and it's always worth it. Like now, I found another talent. I can manage a business and I can see opportunities in expanding business. And it's really good to know that not much of a people that I know can do this. Makes me believe that I can do myself a good work.

So now, after chasing various types of dreams, let's just say you just have to focus on 1 or 3 things to make it work. Right now, I'm focusing in Goldilocks, my study, and also my new branding blog Brands Etc. Why another blog? Haha. I just figure out that maybe if I put all of my knowledge about brands, some people will take interest in hiring me as their marketing staff or as their creative division in advertising agencies. And why would I do that? I don't know actually. But I just wanna live up my dreams and somehow I wish I could get a shot at least in one of it. Be an actual artworker in a way that I never know by now.

Hey, at least I dare to start my dream. :)

Goldilocks (Part 1: Logo)

2010-02-21T23:16:00.003+07:00

Good evening, Lovers!

What did you do on this lovely Sunday?

Me actually working and working again. But this time I just stayed home so that I can work on my tasks. I am definitely need to spend time for my family. Ok, I admit it they visited me but I just stay in front of Monkey's laptop. Not a good habit, though?

Anyway, today I worked on my last assignment about a brand called Esia, which you guys already know about. And also working on my Goldilocks! Just a logo, actually. *laugh* But I really happy about this. I should make this happen on March! That's why pleaaasseeee somebody will you lend me a large amount of money? I promise I will do good.

Okay, enough with the begging, here's the logo that I made today:

What do you think about it? Isn't it exciting starting a fashion brand from scratch?

OH, TOTALLY EXCIIIITTTING THAT I CAN'T WAIT. *smirk*

Yeah, Push It! Push It Real Good!

2010-02-19T21:40:00.001+07:00

Looks like my Monkey enjoyed fucking a mannequin made by his own bag and his own sweater.

Hectic Pathetic

2010-02-19T21:02:00.003+07:00

Hello hello hellooo, it's been YEARS since I haven't updated!

Anyways, what's been going on lately in my little world?

First of all I've been busy like hell. This job that I had in SORE Band got more and more heavier each day since they're going to launch their latest EP Sombreros Kiddos and I've been working in pre-order administration division. It's fun doing it but exhausting at the same time. I mean, look at my face now.

It's a face of a pathetic workaholic.

But the good news is I will be graduating in about months! This is my last term and I would do whatever it takes to be good at it! Wish me a good luck will you?

Speaking of good luck, me and my Monkey is about to launch our first fashion line. It has the touch of vintage that I really love and the brand is going to be Goldilocks and The Party Bears. I will launch it in March but I'm still stumbling on the money problem. Everything hasn't been good to me lately. I wish I was born rich.

Thankyou for keeping up with me! Have a gooood day! :)

KECES and Surprise Tradition

2009-12-28T19:09:00.003+07:00

I am now currently belong to this girl group called Keces. Hahahhaa cheesy ain't that? Yeah, but we're just having fun and it's not like girls gang that so private and exclusive, nooope. I said, it's just a way for us to have fun.

Keces used to be called Desperado because we formed in a year of great depression. I mean like, some people were breaking up from their bf and their pretty much depressed that they need friends to back up on them. I am myself in not so called depressed back then. But hey, I have good friends like them and good friends are hard to find.

So, we have this tradition that each person in our group should have a surprise party. They need to be make special on their birthday and special in our group means, being surrounded by their friends and have a good time with them. They got me a surprise party as well and I'm soo happy about it. And now I realize that soon we will work our ass off or study again and we won't be together again and things will be different from now. I'm going to miss our sweet surprises :(

14th February, Sari Rahayu's Birthday

Before the surprise started. We are actually creating this slumber party theme for her.

Location: Raissa Disa's room.

The cheerful big girl with her signature smile. We love you, girl!

Wild after party along with the guys, rrrarrrrr.

24th June, Adelia Christina Barus' Birthday:

Putri is acting weird again ahhahahaha.

Make a wish, Adel!

We love youuu!

4th August, Karina's Birthday!

Surprise party at the Putri Duyung Cottage. Awww I feel bad for not coming. :(

Karina got a Zara dress for present! Envy envy!

Wow, that shocking face is surely worth millions!

Happy 20th birthday, dear!

The surprise team.

23rd September, Gargentiana Gian's Birthday!

Knock knock! Is Genti here?

Genti and her signature Ju-On face.

The victim seemed drowsy but yeah we had a lot of fun!

24th September, My Birthday!

Wow they're really bringing their ass off here to Bintaro!

Blow out the candles!

Thankyou Putri and Inda for coming! I love you guys! :)

7th October, Raissa Disa's Birthday!

We strike a pose right before we knock on her house. And with those piggy ponytails.

Raissa is just awoken but she's smiling! Hooorayh!

No bath, no shower, but still cool aren't we? And I don't get that X signs from Genti & Nadia.

5th November, Natalia Putri Tampubolon's Birthday!

Happy birthday, princess! We got you roses and a Disney Princess crown!

Wearing all purple on purpose because Putri looooves purple!

Actually we still have 3 more surprises to go.

Nadia's surprise is already posted on the previous post. So next will be for Inda and Rachel.

I will post em as soon as possible! :)

Hey, KECES! I love you girls sooo much! XOXOXO

Missing College Life That Soon To Be Over On 2010

2009-12-28T18:18:00.002+07:00

Hello everyone! What's for dinner?

I believe I've never tell anything about me and my best friends on college. Maybe in someway like scattered around the evil posts. But overall, I'm happy that I met them throughout these years and I think I'm going to miss them soon because I'll graduate in 2010. Yes, it's already the 6th semester and it's going to be over soon. :(

These are the days that I'm going to miss on my 5th semester.

Nadia's Birthday:

Anyway, 26th of December is Nadia's birthday and I'm totally excited for her! She's been my very best friend among all. I don't know why but mostly we stick together since the first year.

Nadia & me on our Yogyakarta trip

Anyway, the birthday surprise is suppose to be exciting and surprising! But in fact Nadia is going to her cousins' house so we have to stay outside. And still I don't know why Sari is eager to take pictures of us.

Left - Right: Uwo, Vita, Karina, Adel, Genti, Sari, Putri, Me

But thank god she came home right after we called her and we successfully celebrate her birthday! In a weird way.

Left - Right: Uwo, Vita, Putri, Karina, Adel, The Birthday Girl, Genti

Down: Sari & Me

Weird Class Presentation/Assignments:

Our 5th semester on Public Relations Diploma University of Indonesia is well known for its' numerous assignments in groups.

But it's a load of fun! And some of it is well-captured on these pics:

Creating a flower-ish display for Lobby And Negotiation class.

Left - Right: Rachel, Inda, Me, Putri, Adel

Still with the sunflower group.

Left - Right Up - Down: Me, Inda, Adel, Rokky, Putri, Fariska, Esya, Rachel

Another display for Lobby And Negotiation Class.

Come on I can't tell you which one is which one. Too much of em.

Together with Mrs. Henny, the lecturer, in the middle. We're boasting like kindergartens.

Role playing for Communication Strategies in Handling Crisis class as DPR.

Left - Right: Putri, Nadia, Poypoy, Salman, Me

This is soooo 'You wishhhhhhh!' Hahahahha.

On our presentation for Social Marketing class. Bermain Bersama Alam.

Left - Right: Sari, Poypoy, Nadia, Me, Putri, Karina.

Green and orange for Public Relation Campaign presentation. It's Toni Jack's!

Left - Right: Salman, Nadia, Sari, Poypoy, Putri, Me, Karina

And the last (it's just today!) we're lobbying DPU (Departemen Pekerjaan Umum) 's PR to build an information clinic in order to educate its' workers according to UU KIP No 14 Th 2008.

Left - Right: Nando, Sari, Putri, Nadia, Karina, Me

These were all stressful yet enjoyable! Because we're doing it together. And we get to imagine ourselves as a PR from our favorite brands or companies. The more you imagine, the more you get good grades. I'm aiming myself for graduating as cum laude as well.

Oh and I can assure you that I'm pretty good at this.

And I need some internship as a marketing PR.

You can call me or email me if you're interested. Heehee.

Oh, Snap!

2009-12-11T20:50:00.003+07:00

First of all, I would like to apologize for all of the people that I've met today.

I have fangs and I can surely bite. But unlike any vampires, I snap easily.

Not like any snappers, I used to be so quietly angry and talk behind them. But now, right after I fed on human blood, I get to be more savage and beast than ever. Now I always yell if I'm angry. Or at least it has value added. Yeah, it's dirty words if you ask me. The good side is, I always get to forgive easily than before because that person or people have already know that I don't like the way they behave so at least we know each other more. Like they know what I don't like about them so I don't need to be grumpy all the time. Yeah, tell them what you hate about them added with dirty words equals peace.

So, uhnyway, things hadn't been so friendly with me recently.

First is one of your friend is hooking up with a girl that you don't like. A too-friendly and too-much-smile and too-helpful girl is one of the girls you'll love to hate. Well I dislike her for some reasons. Plus I'm still mad at them for leaving me behind. I know, I'm such an asshole for saying this. Well, I'm a bitch don't forget that.

And so I decided to block em out of my life. One good way for calming myself up and to not get mad all the time. All you need is time and a break from them. Oh yeah, I'm also sick of my friend who always have to be the headline of everything. 'The Headline', I called him. A boy who nagged and bragged to me almost everyday. Hey, Headline. You know who you are. And what's more sicker of the sickest of all is that he will show my message to his new-found-girlfriend. Eventually. Sucksssssss.

Second, my best buddy is late again. She's always late to evvvvvvery meeting we've had. And I'm quite pissed off because she never treats us lunch. Oh it has always been a tradition that if you're late, you have to buy us lunch. And so I snapped at her by saying,

"Don't be late again, girl. You've always been late with EVERYTHING."

Small words but she apologized soon and said that she promised me she will never be late again. In tears.

Third, some asshole just had a feud with his girl. The girl was crying pitifully, and that asshole is angrily yelled at her. Then, shitnetronly, he dropped a plastic of water that boomed out and splash all over Monkey's laptop. And so I yelled at him,

"HEY IF YOU'RE ANGRY, DON'T JUST DROP A BUNCH OF WATER LIKE THAT! MY LAPTOP IS ALL SOAKED BECAUSE OF YOU, SON OF A BITCH! FUCK!"

I know, I know, this is the worst. The happy-go-lucky girl gone wild. I've kept my anger for a day enough to snapped at some fucking asshole stranger. But look at the bright side, that fag stopped being angry to his girlfriend, (seemed like my voice is bigger and angrier than his. CHICKEN.) and he apologized to me with that oh-so-nice-smile-but-you-can't-fool-me-fag. He said he wanted high-five. But I gave him the grumpy high-five.

What about happiness?

Uhm, I'M HAPPY BECAUSE MY BESTFRIENDS ARE BACK! JOOOHOOOOO!!

Everybody is getting along well right now. No catfights, no feuds, it's peace, dude! I can smell the meadows from here. We talked about the problems we used to have and make up.

I can say that I miss you guys so much V and U.

So much for months of catfight.

Welcome back! :)

Okay, that's it for today. Any questions?

Grace Sitorus' Version of Libra and Scorpio

2009-11-27T12:37:00.003+07:00

A good friend of mine, Grace Sitorus or preferably called Jo, posted this in her blog.

LIBRA (The Lame One)
Nice to everyone they meet. Their Love is one of a kind. Silly, fun and sweet. Have own unique appeal. Most caring person you will ever meet! However, not the kind of person you wanna mess with… You might end up crying ..

Hahahahhaa I guess this is SOO TRUE!
But why does it have to be The Lame One?
It bugs me like hell.

What about my Monkey's sign, Scorpio?

SCORPIO (The Addict)
EXTREMELY adorable. Intelligent Loves to joke. Very Good sense of humor. Energetic. Predict future. GREAT kisser. Always get what they want. Attractive. Easy going. Loves being in long relationships. Talkative. Romantic. Caring.

Yes, he's a great kisser!

Knowing this all it's even make me feel like half Scorpion over and over again.

To know about your sign please visit Grace's blog, or go to this link instead.

Rangga Hilman

2009-11-22T01:18:00.005+07:00

I just want to say I miss you so much. I want to make up all the lost times we've had and celebrate this new-found-love that should be everlasting.

Remember when I told you that I fall in love with you finally after 3 months of unexplainable waiting list for you? That's when the time that I believe and I'm sure at myself that I'm ready for something new. Because you are unbelievably true. And not much of the man in the world who would dare to love someone like me.

I see you weren't joking about this.

I was your very best friend. We laugh and cried at the same time telling about each other's pathetic love life. You and your open-relationship-with-each-boys-she-can-get ex and me with my no-hope-and-no-future-left-ex. I see you were looking something new. Something loyal. Something faithful. And you see I was looking something new too. Something peculiarly normal. Something that can be trusted by my family. We see something in common about this. And we see each other as a fit. As a team. As an unity.

I remember the times you were playing games. Sort of unfaithful games. With one condition I can't accept. And you successfully turned me into the third girl. I have no other option but to accept that if I really want you.

And that day, we were beast thanks to the deadline.

You had this deadline for a new wife-to-be. And I had this deadline for returning to my husband-to-be. We are escapist basically. In urgent need for something new as an escapism from our daily routine. And as a refreshment, you chose me among million girls that you can choose. I saw your humbleness and your talkative manner that leads to your popularity among girls. I thought you were just the same as any other men I've known. But no you're not. You are different. I still wish They have more you for girls in this world but I still haven't figured it out yet.

And do you know why I accept you to accompany me in this horrifying world? Aside from the deadline, I just believe in you. In which the belief of creating a blissful situation for me every day and night. I know, love isn't something that showed up on first date. But you see, I have more than enough crush for you. Ok maybe this aside from the same experience thingy. :p

People said we're look-a-like. Pretty much similar depth of face that carved into our head. What's weird is, I look like your mom, and you look like my mom. This round eyes with thick eyebrows and long eyelashes, followed with large red nose, round face, and oh well different shapes of lips. We are not so different.

I remember the times when people often mistaken me as your sister, or mistaken your sister as my sister. I wish this means I was accepted into your family. Because I know, the love that I gave to you not only belong to you. But also to them. In 19 years of my liberal life, I found a family. A real family where I feel like I belong with them. I don't know, but when I meet you, I can feel your love for me as a father, a husband, a brother, and a best friend. You complete me. And after I meet them, I know where those comes from. Even sometimes, I'm jealous of you. I wish I can be loved as much as you do during childhood. I wish I can be as happy as you. I wish I'm a part of your family. And me writing this isn't only about how I'm jealous of you. It's about how I really love them. :')

I also remember those times when we're attracted to one thing that leads to another. Remember this Crocs? It's the first Crocs we have. And by now, I have five, and you have three of them. Sometimes I giggled every time I saw them pairing as one family of big large shoes. It reminds me of you a lot. And now, right after the Crocs euphoria is cleared, we're huge fans of leather shoes. Like any other new-found-hobby, we also know that we dare to spend large amount of money for our brand-fetish-hobby.

Not just for stuffs, we dare to celebrate our love by food each day. That's where the expenses went down all these years. Sometimes we try different kind of foods although we don't have enough money for it and we're more than hungry to eat two cows. We don't care. Do you remember our supposed-to-be-food-critic blog? Where the hell it was? Hahaha. There we are again with our temporary works.

I know neighbors' green lawn is always look better than ours. And I know so well. What I'm trying to say is, I hope you won't take your eyes away from me. Please say that I'm always be yours. Entirely. Yeah, I know this sounds cliche like returning to those high-school cheesy love stories, but I want this to be sure. Just to make sure, tell me if you fell for somebody else. Please tell me.

Because you know I love you. And I always will. What you're waiting for? I might not be a very good wife because of this egocentric brain and a talent for numerous disastrous moments, but hey, you said I inspired you! If you want this to be legal, then so be it. I'm not as perfect as you are, I know. And I'm not as perfect as she is, I surely know. But at least I tried. And we have this bright future in front of us. Well, what do you know, parents do count.

Remember when it's so hard for you and your ex to be together? Imagine now. When everything seems so easy to see each other and be each other til tomorrow. I can't believe how magic works on us. But this is just as I expected. You and your unlimited patience is above beyond. I believe I need someone to control me as much as I control someone else. And I believe your public speaking skill is your talent. If not, then how come you dare to lobby both your family and mine?

I love you, BB.
And I'm sorry if I'm such a pain for you. I did mean a bit but overall I didn't mean it at all.
I'm sorry too for tonight. I didn't mean anything but to hug you back. I don't know, but, aside from my miscellaneous act of apathy yesterdays, I belong to you now. It's just why I always miss you lately and imagine myself as yours. No offense but, these bad dreams about you and me stumbling upon our way to the future annoys me so much.
I just wish for our time to come faster, that's it.

Yes, I know you love me too. :')

P.S: I am happy the way life goes for us, Crocs, and secondhand shoes.

Disconnecting

2009-11-19T01:36:00.002+07:00

Not much fun coming up around lately. This disconnecting thingy is way heavier than what I thought it would be. Here I am in my own world searching for something new. And while I am, I disconnect myself from you, you, and you.

The world is not square, I know. But I don't know what was going on. You see, even jump jump has this up and down. And so do I. I can be your best friend while I can be your acquaintances at the same time. And today is just not yours. I belong to him.

It's been weeks, I know. It's just I'm very much tired of things and I need something secure, something safe, something feels like home. And that doesn't include you. All of you. Yet.

I'm knitting too much thoughts in my mind that separate me from you, from all of you. Do you think I need to find my way home? Maybe not now.

November 17, 2009

2009-11-16T23:00:00.005+07:00

It's the new tarot update from Facebook.
It says:

"Eight Of Swords
You are too independent and others feel they cannot get close to you. People feel they bring nothing to your life and do not understand why you would want them around. Too focused on one's own goals. Feeling of freedom, but also have not formed ties. You come across as though no one could ever fool you. A little full of yourself."

Don't you think it's linked to the latest blog post that I write?
You know, the over-confidence thingy.
It's like they read my mind.

OH NO IT'S ALIVE.

Gulp.

Ineedmyholiday

2009-11-15T20:46:00.000+07:00

Do You Remember Sailormoon?

2009-11-15T07:13:00.001+07:00

It's one of my childhood idol. I used to dance around with the tiara and the magic stick. Such stupid but I miss those moments.

OVER CONFIDENCE! Yeap.

2009-11-15T01:06:00.002+07:00

Today I have this weird situation.

I hang out with Monkey and his friends and so, we're talking about something usually usual. Until, one of his friends left then suddenly Monkey hugged me. He said,

"Oooohh, how pretty she is! Dear, can I have two girlfriends?"

Right there I really wanna slap him in his face for saying something so particularly humiliating as if I'm not prettier enough for him that he needs another girl. Humiliating? YES! HIS FRIENDS WERE LAUGHING LIKE ROFL LMAO etc etc. And so to keep myself calm and cold-headed, I told him yes-he-can-if-I-can-too.

After an hour, I finally decided to tell him that I don't like what he did today. It's all because of me and my ego and also my over confidence behavior that made me always feel like nothing compares me. I might be narcissistic and self centered, but it helps a lot when you need to compete with others. For example, when you're in the middle of the competition whether it's swimming, dancing, or even debate, make sure that you're confidence enough to show what you got. For me, over confidence is good. But for you, I don't think so. Well it depends on how you manage your hopes. If it's too high because of your over confidence level and suddenly when you figure out that you're not, you'll get a heartbreak.

And for this case, I always think that I'm the prettiest girl alive in Monkey's eyes. And no one can beat me for that. Yet I'm the best girlfriend, the smartest, the most talented, whoopsie I think I shouldn't continue it..

I think this over confidence over my Monkey is the best for me. Because if not, when I get jealous with other girl, I'm going to think like, 'She's prettier than me, she's smarter than me, and he will fell into her! What should I do what should I do?' Even though you're the real girlfriend, these stuffs can still bring you down.

Hey, back to my story, in the end, Monkey said that he's sorry. I and him always have this karma law that if he did that to me, than I can also do that to him. We do this to keep things balanced. And since he doesn't want me to do this to him, it means I won over him.

And I'm still his most beautiful girlfriend EVER!
Lol

Giraffe Love

2009-11-06T07:46:00.002+07:00

I made this for my most beautiful giraffe friend ever, Maria Inda Genoveva.
With just one message in it,

"Hey, we all care about you. And we all love you. You can have all the love in the world and trust me, you need to stay focus on yourself especially in making hard choices for your life. God bless you, girl!"

:)

1960s

2009-10-21T19:19:00.003+07:00

Right after the new haircut euphoria moment, Monkey suggested that we should take more pics.

So here we are now in his garden, with our 1960s theme.

Pics taken by: Acer Webcam

Photo-editing using: Picnik

New New Haircut

2009-10-21T19:09:00.002+07:00

Helloo, new comers!
What a day yeah? Uh huh?

Want some good news?
Yes, I had this long long wavy hair that I used to love but shorty is back!
I recently cut my hair into something so 60s yet I found it's too cute.
Yeah, something like this:

Not so 19 years old right?
Yeah right I look like a junior high schooler, those god dammit youngsters.

So then I decided to cut my hair like this:

TOTALLY LOVE IT!

And soo me and Monkey decided to take some pics because we go ga-ga for it. With his webcam and http://www.picnik.com.

These are awesomes.

And to tell you the truth, I find myself in a high confidence with this new awesome hair. Everybody said I look more beautiful with it. And it's a great price to pay!

I mean, what do you expect from a new haircut other than looking good, confidence, and praises from others?

Pedo Bear

2009-10-12T00:39:00.002+07:00

So Dipta is finally told me that the cute bear in Comic Con pics is Pedo Bear.
She said, it's a pedophilia bear. And she told me to google it. And I did!

So here's the information that shown as I googled the Pedo Bear:

If you go down to the woods today,

You're sure of a big surprise

If you go down to the woods today,

You'd better go in disguise.

For ev'ry Pedo that ever there was,

Will gather there for certain, because

Today's the day the Pedo Bears have their picnic.

Ev'ry Pedo Bear who's "sportin' wood",

Is sure of a treat today.

There's lots of marvelous lolis to lick,

And wonderful games to play

Beneath the trees where nobody sees,

They'll chase and rape as long as they please

'Cause that's the way the Pedo Bears have their picnic!

~Pedobears

Genus : Pais Ursidae - Hairy / Furry Mammal
Diet: Loli's / Carnivore
Nocturnal unless hunting.

Commonly Known as 'Pedo-Bear',
It hunts rural and urban enviroments alike,
searching for un-suspecting underage (Loli) female humans.

(Notes:) Typically Tagged and Released back into
General Population with hopes of Rehabilitation.
Can be easily found on local Sex Offender Websites
or by the mandatory Sex offender Sign in front of his
Cave / Dwelling.

A-typical hunting patterns are useless, as the Pedobear Typically leaves no evidence found at the sight of a
Loli-Attack, only the occasional signs of a struggle
and the ever so rare, semen/DNA sample..

Females are the target, Since Pedobear appears to be a huge cuddly teddy bear. Unbenounced and naive, the child is savagely (imo)devoured.

Typical Behavior Suggests that this PedoBear Contains Semi-Human Consiousness with full ability to operate technology, computers and even heavy machinery.

He's able to Show up at a Sleepover or a Pillow Fight in a moments Notice. Able to instant message a 12 year old on Myspace IM in a moments Notice. Lurks around message boards waiting for the admins to fall asleep.
Can be heard in the wild, howling 'CP!! GET IT!'

Mainly Observed on Social Sites Like MySpace,
FaceBook and sometimes even CraigsList.

Known to also stalk around windows at night.

Who is PedoBear?:
Pedo Bear basically boils down to an Internet predator of minors. P.B, is your a-typical child molester, or basically anyone who does horrible things to minors. On or Offline.
The FBI and Local Police Dept would love to talk to him.
So, if you're PedoBear, You might want to give them a call.

Why A (Cartoon) Bear, You Might Ask?
Well, mainly for the view of Danger, as in someone looking at a Bear. Yes, he may be cute and furry...
but the odds really are.. It'd Rip your Face off.
(ask the bear dude) So The Same Rules Apply.

There is Also Speculation about the Homosexual
sterotype of 'Bears',
I.E.: Someone who is extremely hairy, and overweight.

To make this point clear... Homosexuals are not Pedophiles.. Only Pedophiles are Pedophiles.
Pedobear is just a PedoBear.

The Pedo bear graphic is just a simple sterotype, made into a lovable cartoon character for the sake of general humor and supreme product placement.

Pedo Bear typically is shown stealing children, running from the FBI and occasionally limping around missing a foot (From a Failed FBI Bear Trap)

(all pics are courtesy of http://pedobearpics.com)

Oh my goooooodddd... A child molester... LOL!

Pedo Bear surely reminds me of him:

And this too:

Hey Sir, I Just Wanna Tell You How Fucking Pathetic You Are

2009-10-11T02:45:00.001+07:00

I hate him. I hate him soo much.

Here's the thing, I'm a girl and you're a big old guy yet everytime you come to my house you always have to sleep in my room and I sleep outside? You're crazy. I need to have my personal space. I'm an individualist! Even though I hate the times when you visit us, but I still love to have J in my home. She's the real sister to me, my weird angel.

Fyi, I know how you just can't live without the air conditioner. Well well, you know what, what you always do cost a lot for my grandparents. And everytime you visit us, you brought these huge pails of dirty laundries but you rarely paid for it. Great. More expenses for them and you rarely help.
And, the way you behave, it brings a whole lot of negative energies around. I feel like you don't love me anymore. Because you've never talked to me again. But you always ask me something that always leads to a conclusion that I'm always wrong, and you're always right. Arguing, that's just what you love the most. Even worse, you won't listen to anybody. It happens not just to me but also to my grandparents. Funny. Because it shows me what kind of loser you are. Such pain in the ass. No wonder your wife left you. Ha.
No offense, Sir, but this happens for years already and I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! You hear that?

I CAN'T TAKE IT A NY MORE

And I really don't care if you read this or anyone who knows you read this post.
This is my blog.
I can do whatever I want.

My suggestion is, go find yourself a mirror. There you'll find that pathetic-grumpy-old-fucking-man that I always see.

Comic Con!

2009-10-09T12:58:00.003+07:00

Hello there, Boys and Girls!
How are you today?

I'm very much homesick right now (yes I'm sick, and I stay at home) so I've got nothing to do recently. Actually, I have classes to be attended until Saturday, but hell yeah I really don't wanna care about that right now. I've been a very good girl attending all classes for weeks and I think I deserve some rest.

Please pray for me so I can meet you guys again soon. :(

Anyway, during my homesick times, I did nothing but browsing. And so, I found this pretty cool site about art, photoshop, etc etc. And for the weird bonus is, they provide this super cool pics during Comic Con! It's an annual event in USA for fictional characters. Even Twilight casts held a press conference there! (click it here to read more)

Left - Right: Edi Gathegi - Cam Gigandet - Robert Pattinson - Kristen Stewart - Taylor Lautner - Rachelle Levefre

GOSH TAYLOR YOU'RE SOO HHOT!

Enough about Twilight, I also find this SUPER DUPER COOOOOOOOL pics on Royal Tutorial! This is just some pics that's been taken on Comic Con.

But I LIKE IT!

I don't know what this is but it's cute!

Buzz Lightyear! <3

Aww Patrick, you're so chubby!

OMFG, Jack Sparrow?? This guy is a total Johnny Depp immitation!

Again, I don't know this but it's just... weird

Wooooottt, the mutant ninjas!

All hail to the JOKER!

Oh woow, I think it's going to be so crazy out there for the next 2010 Comic Con. The next theme is all about ape! APE! My monkeey!
I wanna go there I wanna go there urgh!

Me and My Imagination, You and Your Ego.

2009-10-09T02:34:00.003+07:00

Don't speak a word anymore 'cause I've had enough of you. This isn't real, this isn't true. Me and my own imagination and you with your own ego. Since I think like boys and you think like girls, then it will never stop. You aren't suppose to be so sensitive, and I'm not supposed to be too careless. But what the heck, that's just why we were created. To fulfill each other's. But somehow, I will never see the meeting point between us. Me and my imagination, me and my imagination. And for you, who thought that these words are for you, in fact it's not. Just so you know, there are tons of 'You' if I'd like to say. But maybe, you are one of them. Just in case you're so desperately guessing who's the one I've mentioned here.

Gizi Tinggi Makanan Mahasiswa

2009-10-09T02:30:00.003+07:00

This is just an artwork that I created for Gizi Tinggi Makanan Mahasiswa's crew tee design. Cute, eh? No? Haa, well maybe I should try harder.

I Love You, Girl!

2009-10-05T01:59:00.003+07:00

Remember the times when you say 'I Love You' to one of your girlfriends?
Sometimes it's just need a frim fram sauce to make friends with em though you don't really love them.
Kissing their cheeks, saying how pretty they are,
Those are just casual formalities needed though you don't feel that way about them.

Our world, is very complicated.
That's why I understand boys better than girls.

So, how easy is that to say 'I Love You' to someone?

It's just as easy as faking it to your girlfriends.

Imaginary Friend

2009-10-04T23:52:00.005+07:00

Look at her eyes, those kaleidoscope eyes.
Running around the wild blue sky, searching for life meanings.
Was she really alone in this world?
Or was she just seeking for attention?

People said she was lively.
Bringing out the love and beauty in her.
Well in fact,
It was just their imagination.

Her naive face and her soft gentle hands touches the grasses as I passed by.
Longing for the love she used to have.
The wind breezes throughout the forest, with the scent of apricot caught from her hair.
I wipe her tears as the water flooded from her blue beautiful eyes.
Then she begin to sing about faith and keeping words; a beautiful lullaby to be missed.
I close my watery eyes.
Then I began to fall down deeply into the beautiful world of fiction.

And I still believe,
That she is just my imagination.

Reckless

2009-10-04T23:29:00.003+07:00

I know that I'm supposed to do my assignments right now. But I don't know why, I just feel so sad. I've been a very outspoken girl lately, but I think I just fake it all up. I pretended to be happy while I don't know what the hell is going on. I always wanna cry. But I don't think that anyone would want to understand why. I'm not that important. Lately I've been solving my friends problems and try to make 'em happy. But the truth is, I feel flat. My iPod is filled with calming songs that suits the rainy days. I'm just not in the mood, is that wrong? I feel like crying but I don't have enough guts to flow it all out. Y'all must be laughing at me right now since I play the EMO joke on people but I find myself very emo lately. Yeah, sort of. I don't know, maybe I'm just depressed with the way it is now. I should be happy, but not much happiness can be trade with that. It's not brokenhearted if it's not really broken. It's not really sadness when nothing really happens. All I need is someone to care for me. Unlike anyone else. Someone has gone and something happened the way they should be. Like an empty room. For once I feel about taking my boat gone a little further, away from the shore. But I think it's not going to happen since I pretty much sure about the destination. Which, not really sure again knowing what's it's going to be. I feel guilty. I feel bad. I don't wanna trust myself, knowing that I would gone too much further. I wanna trust this, what I have right now. Moments to be treasured, and to be shared altogether.
And in the end,

I wish I wasn't me.

Very Well

2009-10-01T14:59:00.003+07:00

The clouds are grey
The stakes are high
I wasn't going to peek
It's just this weird taste I'm tasting isn't available for me now
Just like Loveaffair by Club 8
It mesmerizes me and it turns me on
For whatever it is,
I know that I have committed a crime
For once it could be forgiven
But not for more

Dear Frank, my beloved,
What will happen if the sky is no longer blue?
What will happen if the grass are no longer green?
I will always be there sitting holding all of your love
I swear I'll share all of the love in this world
Painting the torn glasses altogether pieces by pieces

I want you to want me
That's that

Squids Gone Mad

2009-09-25T02:56:00.001+07:00

A remembrance of the squid moment

My Favorite Happy Birthdays

2009-09-25T01:40:00.005+07:00

aleantipony wahhh makan2 dong? selamat yah pochi..sukses teruss!!..RT @pocchinko: @aleantipony ooom today is my birthday loh! :D

SOREband says happy 19th birthday to @pocchinko! :) warm hugs from Sore and the tantes :D. we love you!

Odnomar @pocchinko: banyak2 minum susu ya biar lekas besar :-D

Sari Rahayu dear canti widyadhari,
pertama2 gw ngga rela umur lo masi 19 taun! kedua gw berharap lo makinmeninggi dgn kadar body yg makin montok depan nya HAHA, yg terakhir"HAPPY BORNDAY 19th" and many happy wishes for youuuuuuuuu! woff you :)

Raysha Primita halo sayang yang sekarang tambah tua heheh happy birthday love !
best wishes for you. have a great one dear.
muuaahhhhh :)

Mufli El POCAYYY.. hepi birthday yooo..
haha semoga makin sukses ya pocch..

24 september memang tgl yang paling oke ya gk.ehhee

Vina Angelina Prasetyo pochi selamat ulang tahun...ayo yg rajin menggambarnya yaaa..be blessed!

Dicky Irchamsyah pocay! happy bday wish u all the best! semoga diberi kekuatan dan kesabaran mengarungi kehidupan yang fana ini...haha...okaay!

Abdullah Ghifari Al-Attas POOCH, happy birthday and have a great day! :)
jangan lupa traktir hehe

best wishes for you, girl!

Ade Firza Paloh Pochiii met ultah yeee..cepet besarlah kau nak..take life easily and smile thru all the perils in life..hayo gambar lagi, kalo ngewarnain jangan keluar garis ya hehehehe..

Noni Hannisa Fajnur happy b'day little pochi..enak ya br 19thn..jd sebel nih udh 20..heheheheeee
HAPPY B'DAY dear,wish you all the best ya poch..=)

Dyah Ayunico Ramadhani Have a super duper great year birthday girl!
Life's no different with a sketchboard. How we draw our life story is within our full authority! draw it well honey ♥

Adinda Mutiara Sabila happy birthday sayaang! stay cute and adorable and squishy and lovable and and and when the need arises, sexy! ♥ ♥ masih dance gak?

Hamada Ahmad Abdool Adek pocita, Happy belated b'day! Wish u always all the best.. Keep on being the unique you!
19 taun ya? Aaarghh msh kcil bngeeett..ngiri...
God bless

Aji Sora SELAMAT DAN SUKSES SELALU

Muhamad Robbyansyah TAHUN ULANG KOK SELAMAT? ULANGAN TENGAH TAHUN SELAMATAN?

selamat ulangan akhir tahun
#robs

Ananta Pramahastar selamat ulang taun kawan...
smoga cepat lulus seperti pacarmu itu

tolong traktir saya di depan pendulum

Novira Kartika Mayangsari HAPPY BIRTHDAY CANTI! YEAAAY FINALLY 19 y.o.
how is it feels? hehe :)
wish you all the best! :D

Resatio Adi Putra selamat ulg tahun ke 23

Anyway, thank you all for your birthday wishes!
It's been too much to handle that I feel like an one day celebrity.

Yes, I feel famous yesterday.

Thaaanks! :)

Rose

2009-09-23T23:31:00.002+07:00

I love roses. It's so... delicately misterious, yet charming

19

2009-09-23T22:39:00.005+07:00

I'm going to turn 19 in a few hours.
I really can't believe it! Wow, I'm in the last step of teenage! Once I get into 20 then nothing will ever be the same again. I remembered how I was on last year's birthday. I want something special. And it really shows in my behavior. I will get so angry if Monkey doesn't prepare something special for my birthday. Then, Monkey did exactly just what I want. But I realized that what I want cost him so much. He got all teary about it and he really felt like being pushed by me. It's been a pressure for him. It's been a real pressure trying to keep me happy. Like now. He told me that he's confused. I've told him that I just want myself becoming 19. I don't need any present, I don't need any surprises, I just need me and myself just that. Well, perhaps I need him to come to my house, or his kisses, or his birthday wish, well too much to ask. But still it's not as much as what I want last year. So I think this wouldn't bother him that much. Apparently, I wasn't being too correct about it since he's still confuse about surprise or no surprise. Anyway, here's my bday wishes. I want to be more mature I want to make my parents & grandparents happy and keep the peace going on between them I want to be loved more by people And last but not least, I want to be older Because I often being mistaken as a little kid. And I dislike that just now when I realized that I'm too old for child's play.
Hey it's almost 12 o'clock!

Can't wait...

CAN'T WAIT!

Oh well, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME! :D

I CAN SING, GUYS! Hear me!

2009-09-23T22:22:00.002+07:00

I CAN SING.

YES, I CAN SING.

I really love to sing, but somehow, I don't consider it as a hobby. Although, I sing like evvvverryyyyday! But still, I won't put it in any of my resume. Because it would be too common, too usual, and somehow, nothing so special about it. Because, well you know, every girls can sing.

Do you know what will happen if a girl admit that she could sing?

Yes, people will ask her to do that.

Honestly, I'm not really that type of girl. I am soo not a girl who likes showing off in front of a lot of people. I still have that narcissistic talent, though. But I prefer to do that thing behind the scene and after it's finished, I'll show it all to you. I still don't like the way I have to show my process in front of people. I have told you that I'm actually a shy girl, haven't I?

But now I really want to show you guys that I can sing! I can even sing better than the girls who admit that they can sing in my class! Woohoo, that's a hidden talent I've told you. But I've never had that chance to sing on stage, also I haven't find the right people to be my team. Singing needs a band. And that band, well, I've never found one.

I can scream, I can do down-low, high pitch,
Any kind of genre, test me. I can beat that.

Curious?

Cat Dog Girl & A Vampire

2009-09-21T09:19:00.002+07:00

The Cat Dog Girl

The Vampire Girl

Nadia

2009-09-21T09:00:00.002+07:00

This is my very best friend Bernadia Deviani. We've been friends since 3 years ago.
On this pic, the lecturer told her to sit in front of the class and type exactly what the lecturer said.

Bernadia Deviani right in front of me. It's a wasted inspiration if I don't draw her!

While Nadia is being 'grounded', I kindly draw this for her:

Gelar Apresiasi Seni Teater Kolam 3 - Creative Open Recruitment

2009-09-20T17:46:00.004+07:00

Me and my college friends are recently busy with another activity. The show we're going to make is Gelar Apresiasi Seni Teater Kolam 3; shortened as Getek 3. It's an art project from Art & Cultural division from BEM FISIP UI which consists of stage performances, art installation etc etc. Here we collect all FISIP UI's community and put them in for a stage act. (Please tell me if I'm wrong haha) And this time the theme is Indonesian Culture. And this time, I work as Head of Creative Team of Getek 3 which means there's more and more art activities to come.

So far I've had good times with the other crew of Getek 3. The craziness is the perfect mixture to less stressed working atmosphere. I work with Inda Genoveva, Maria Andina, Fidhi Almaida, Aji Sora, Abdullah Ghifari, Dipta Nirbito, Bart, Akbar, Echil, Raissa Disa, and Adelia Christina. Those are the crazy boys and girls that perhaps could be the perfect co-workers of this term.

Gelas Teko 3 logo

I remember last week we decided to make an open recruitment for newbies. And so, I created a weird psychotest. First, you have to create something out of the shapes that I made for you. The first shape is a dot, then the second shape is anything I want. It could be a circle, a rectangular, or something out of beyond such as a triangle inside a circle. Yeap, stuffs like that. Then the second test is making a shape of an animal from a colored paper. Then, the last test is answering any kind of crazy question with a crazy answer too. In just 5 seconds. Such as, 'How many mole does a giraffe has?" If you answer "Errr... 5?" then it's a bad answer. But if you answer "Errr... Around 314 moles?" then it's a good one! Because you get to be creative in a tense situation. You get to think hard and create something out of the box. Just so you know, that's what I'm looking for. Me and Dipta actually having a lot of fun doing this test. We get to see those shock faces when they know what kind of crazy test this is. But still, nobody answer the questions the way I wanted. They always stuck in logics. You know, you have to be more calm and loose seeing someone like me.

Anyway, in the test, I provided the contestants with drawing tools. Such as crayons, colored markers, and watercolor palette. But somehow, the one who's been having fun with the tools, is me and the rest of the crew.

Check out this pics:

This is Ayu Ambariatama coloring my sketch using the watercolor

This is my beloved watercolor palette

This is Raissa Disa, also painting my candies sketch

So far we have lots of fun doing this job.

Check out the newborn babies:

This is Arjuna. Monkey and I painted this all night while my grandpa did the sketch. This is a spoiler for Getek 3 Open Recruitment.

This is Sleeping Beauty's rose. I did the sketch and Raissa Disa colored it with watercolor

The french girl. Sketched by me, colored by Raissa Disa

Well I still think that it's not a work. It's a childplay. :D

What do you think?

Idul Fitri Moments

2009-09-20T10:39:00.010+07:00

As usual, me and my family always have this 'Sungkeman' rituals in every Idul Fitri. It's a ritual when you get to be on your knees and say sorry for every sins you've made to the elder. This ritual is always the first to be done before you snap on the cookies and have your meal.

Just like any other Idul Fitri, I always see it skeptically.
My mommy always flooded with tears during 'Sungkeman' and I'm like, oh puhlease, there's nothing so sad about it. In some time I often laugh with my sisters before 'Sungkeman' and often never feel so guilty about my sins. But mostly, when it's my turn to get on my knees, something touched my cold-heart and made my tear falls on its own. But not as flooded as my mommy, of course.

The more I feel guilty about myself, the more I burst. Just when I said, 'I'm sorry, Papi.' my grandpa said, 'Be success in your life, my dear. Don't forget to take care of us when we were old.' I get teary all over then.

Somehow, there's something so funny about today's 'Sungkeman'.
First, my cousin, Sasha, always burst into tears and I mean it's like, totally burst with red nose like a water balloon. She always feels guilty everytime she said sorry in 'Sungkeman'. And I always wonder why she produces so many tears. Hahaha.
Second, I remember I wore make-up for today. And I slightly wear my mommy's bright red Yves Saint Laurent lipstick and erase it a little bit; make it looks like bright pink. During 'Sungkeman', I hugged everybody back there. Including my uncle. And I realized that I just leave a lip mark on his collar. Bright pink lip mark. LOL.

This is me and the silly Ajeng, my cousin.

So today's Idul Fitri is as special as always. We're enjoying our family time, eat chicken opor together, and also eat nachos (that looks so much like pangsit) from my aunt together.
I learn to forgive and to forget. I learn to show how much I care about my family and bringing them together.

But one thing for sure,
I learn to not wear any kind of lipsticks during 'Sungkeman'.

SMOOCH!

Happy Ied!

2009-09-20T08:30:00.001+07:00

Pocchi and The Family of Cappocchino
would like to say,

Happy Idul Fitri!

Please don't hesitate to forgive us for what we've done.
You know, we talk a lot about you here and perhaps showing you a lot of negative sides of you.

Well, that's not the point actually.

Anyway, please forgive me!
You know I care about you soo much that I put your name here.

Love, Pocchi :)

Facebook. REACTIVATED!

2009-09-19T21:19:00.002+07:00

DUE TO IDUL FITRI & UPCOMING FRIENDS BIRTHDAY & ALSO MY BIRTHDAY I DECIDED TO REACTIVATE MY FACEBOOK AFTER A DAY OF DEACTIVATE TRIAL. I DON'T WANNA MISS ALL 'HAPPY BIRTHDAY' POSTINGS ON MY WALL.

BUT I PROMISE YOU I WILL DEACTIVATE IT AGAIN.

SOON.

Esther

2009-09-19T20:54:00.003+07:00

"I don't think Mommy likes me very much."

Ramadhan 2009

2009-09-19T20:00:00.002+07:00

Hey, girls!

How are you today?

Tell me, tell me, what kind of good deeds have you done during Ramadhan? You know, each kind of good deeds that you did on Ramadhan will be paid twice. So, it's like saving your money each day, doubled it, and get tons of them at the end of the day. That is the reason why Ramadhan is so special. It is a sacred holy month where the good deeds are doubled and so does the bad stuff you did.

But for me, this Ramadhan is the plain-est Ramadhan of all.

I didn't do any Tarawih prayer this month, not at all. Even I just made this month a very usual month. Not much of family activites been done. I'm busy at college, doing another event and also balancing it with my study. And since my class are usually late-afternoon class, so I breakfasting at the school's cafeteria. Not much. Very very usual.

And so does Idul Fitri of the year. So usual, and not much excitement around. I have my period on the last days of Ramadhan so I'm officially missing the Ied prayer (again).

Errrr... So will I go to hell because of this?

Orphan

2009-09-19T16:27:00.006+07:00

Happy holiday all!

Today is the last day of Ramadhan so it's been a blast staying all day in home. *grin*

Anyway since I have nothing to do today, I decided to write about one of my favorite movie, ORPHAN.

This is a story about a 9 years old orphan named Esther (Isabelle Fuhrman) who's very talented in arts, and very mature for her age. Her charming persona attracts 2 young married couple named Kate (Vera Farmiga) and John Coleman (Peter Sarsgaard) , who decided to adopt an orphan after Kate's third daughter, Jessica, was stillborn because of her drinking habit. And so, the story continues about how Esther, the lovely porcelain-doll-look-a-like-girl ended up killing people around her.

I'm not going to tell you about how this movie overall. Because if you search it in Google anyway, there are soo many bad reviews about this movie. Not like one of those movie that's going to be nominated in Oscar. But still, I love this movie. The character of Esther sort of reminds me of myself. Because I look younger for a girl around my age, and sometimes I just hate to be called cute, or little girl, etc etc. And in fact, I'm not as sweet as what they think I about me. I am evil and if I want to, I can kill you right now. Just like Esther. In the end of the movie, she finally reveals who she really is. She's actually a 33 years old women named Leena Klammer. She has hypopituitarism, a disorder that stunted her physical growth, and has spent most of her life posing as a little girl. That's why, she seduces John when Kate was away.
Oh, if I'm not stuck in norms and laws, I'd probably do just what Leena did. Posing myself as a little girl all day and then ended up killing my classmates. They won't accuse me as the murderer since I'm the most innocent girl in class. Hahahahaha.

Anyway, the success of this movie is because of the talented actress, Isabelle Fuhrman.

This is Isabelle as Esther. Isn't she cute?

Esther decided to put on Kate's dress to seduce John

Minutes before Esther attempts to kill Daniel

Isabelle on the set to talk about Esther

She's a very talented girl. Successfully made me believe that she's mean and evil. And it's really quite shocking to see her in long straight hair because that Esther looks really suits her. On an interview, when she was asked about what does she thinks about Esther, she said she understands her. 'Well, if you look from her point of view, you will know that she's just a girl that needs to be loved! I don't think she's evil at all.' Wow!

Well if this girl can kill you:

So does this girl:

Naaaaaahhhhhhhhhh.

Haha.

Song For Our Duet: You Are The Sunshine Of My Life by Stevie Wonder

2009-09-19T00:44:00.003+07:00

You are the sunshine of my life
That's why I'll always be around,
You are the apple of my eye,
Forever you'll stay in my heart

I feel like this is the beginning,
Though I've loved you for a million years,
And if I thought our love was ending,
I'd find myself drowning in my own tears

You are the sunshine of my life,
That's why I'll always stay around,
You are the apple of my eye,
Forever you'll stay in my heart

You must have known that I was lonely,
Because you came to my rescue,
And I know that this must be heaven,
How could so much love be inside of you?

You are the sunshine of my life, yeah,
That's why I'll always stay around,
You are the apple of my eye,
Forever you'll stay in my heart

I Should Stop Doing This

2009-09-19T00:30:00.001+07:00

What if it turns out that things are not what they seem?

The Dog Girl

2009-09-18T22:40:00.003+07:00

Hug me like you've never hugged me before.
Touch my skin gently and never let me go.
Kiss me tender, and hung your arms around me.
For I've been longing for your love for my whole life.

Because you know,
I would never care for anyone else but you, dear.

2009-09-18T15:46:00.004+07:00

I may be sweet, I may be sour, my dear.
But I kept all the originals on and I never tried to be like them.
I've had enough life and times of the poseurs.
So I don't expect that words coming out from my mouth for you.
For what I see, you almost copy the way I write.

I don't wanna hate you, darling, but I think you should know. :)

Facebook. DEACTIVATED!

2009-09-18T15:24:00.003+07:00

Guess what?

I just deactivated my Facebook account!

Hahahahhahahaha.

What for?

I just wanna know how long will I last without Facebook and how long will people stand for not having any Facebook connection with me.

Like I said in my Facebook account, I really wanna disappear.

Any problems?

Yesterday All My Troubles Seems So Far Away And Yet They Stayed All Day

2009-09-18T14:13:00.006+07:00

I'm in a very bad mood yesterday. The air breezed softly but the sun won't compromise with me. It's too hot for a very usual day. I walked unhappily as I passed the college hall. Most faces around me were familiar, but not my family. Because the class that I had to attend yesterday is an afternoon class. And I was already stand by there by 11 o'clock. Some interviews for Gelar Apresiasi Teater Kolam 3 had to be done by the wish of Queen Inda Genoveva, one of my best girls. So there I waited.

Then came along from nowhere that annoying girl who talked and stayed where I was. I can tell that she's annoying because she played with my stuff without asking me first. She played with my monkey key chain, and kinda having fun with it without asking whose monkey is that first. I'm the type of stuff-keeper so I really hate people who have no manners; playing with my stuff first without asking my permission. Since I found her very annoying from like, the way she talked etc etc, I decided to keep quiet and continued my valley painting. Then she thought that painting with watercolors is fun too so she decided to give it a shot. And NICE, she made this huge base drawing which means she needs like tons of watercolors to fill that painting. And I'm kinda... dislike that. Because she successfully made a large hole on one of my watercolor palette. You know, like every kind of inexperienced painters who swept too much watercolors on the middle. Dang.

Sorry girl, I don't know what kind of girl you are but I think I have the right to judge your first impression since you messed with my stuff that day. Maybe I will like you some other time. But this time, you were the pain in my ass.

Next annoying moment is went I fought with Monkey. I totally in love with him but love isn't something that what you will think just when you hate him. Somehow and someway we were not on the same channel on that day. The frequencies are soo hard to be merged that day. Just imagine what will happen if you speak English, but your boyfriend speak Uranus. Well, I've never been in love with an alien before, but that's just how I described the relationship we had yesterday. The details are not supposed to be told. So, all I can say, is I hated Monkey soo much that day because he made me swear filthy words and he made me cry. The ups and downs are like a downfall niagara. Too steep and too emotional. So yeah, that's how we rolled yesterday.

Also there are some twirps that I dislike yesterday but emm, no need to point it out one by one.
Because it's just symptoms of the pre-menstrual cycle. Yes, I've had my cycle by this morning.

But still I have the right to hate people, don't I?

ANGER

2009-09-17T13:49:00.001+07:00

I AM SO ANGRY RIGHT NOW WITH SEVERAL PEOPLE BUT I CAN'T TELL YOU EXACTLY WHY IN HERE BECAUSE THEY MIGHT READ IT AND KNOW THAT IT WAS THEM AND IT WILL LEAD TO A CONCLUSION THAT THEY MIGHT WONDER WHY I HATE THEM SO MUCH SO I JUST KEEP MY MOUTH SHUT TODAY AND DRAW SOME ANGRY DRAWINGS TO MAKE MYSELF MORE HAPPY.

AND I WILL POST THE DRAWINGS SOON.

Happy Birthday Grandma!

2009-09-14T04:13:00.005+07:00

This is me and my Grandparents on the high school graduation. One of the proudest moments of all.

Today is me grandma's birthday, 14th of September 2009. The day when she turned 69 years old.

My memories flashed back as I hugged her and say 'Happy Birthday Mommy!' on tonight's sahur. Mommy? Yes, 'Mommy', that's what I called her. Ever since my real blood mom died because of meningitis, she took me in and really take a good care of me.

My mommy was a career woman and she's so strong that I adore her so much. During my childhood, she would fight for anything that related to me. She's a hardworker, and I bet she worked hard to pay my tuition fees and my needs. Although, it's not her job to do that. But she always makes sure that I have everything that I need because she doesn't like to count on anybody else. She's also the typical organizational mom who always attends every school meetings that was made for parents. What I don't understand is her love to me. She is a grandma, but she never shows me that she is. She loves me like her own child, feeds me like her own child, and teaches me like her own child. She doesn't hesitate to snap on me; with high-pitch voice of course, or to call names. The last one is a wrong thing of course, but here I am, so much better than being the one that raised by my father.

Sometimes I'm jealous with all my cousins. My mommy is soo kind to them that everytime they visited us, what they want is above what I want. She treated them like a nice and friendly old lady. Such as give them candies everytime they visit, and buy them everything they want when we go to the mall or shopping areas. I often cried for not having what I want because I have to give it to them. But she always assure me with this phrase.

"You already have everything you want. Because I love you like my own daughter."

And I never know what that means, until now. Until now when I realized how old she already is but still she has to carry difficulties in raising me when my father stays calm out there and not caring so much about me. But it's me and my mommy who want to live together. She won't let me go to him and neither do I.

Living with her, makes me learned a lot from her. Of course, better lessons are learned in here, not in my father's. I learned how to be strong, confident, not depending on anyone to have what you want (including not to depend on men when you want to buy something that perhaps too expensive and not too not affordable such as cars. she bought her own cars, you know?) and also to learn and take lessons when you are down. I remember one day, she was being tricked by her best fellow. He's been a very good friend for her and our family that he sometimes come over to our home, eat in our dining table, sleep in our guest room, and play with the little me. But when she started to trust him so much, he betrayed her. He stole our car, (at first he stole the car's window, tape, etc etc, until the car is finally vanished) but the meanest of all, when my mommy and my uncle came home, he with his friends on motor bike stole my mommy's purse (which had hundreds of dollars in it) and stab my mommy's arm. I was there behind the house's fence. Luckily I didn't decided to go out because I thought, 'Naah, maybe it's just a girl with her skateboard out there.' The next thing that showed when I go out, is the running away bikes, and my bleeding mommy. I was 7 back there. That's also a lesson from her to not trust anyone, whoever it is, even your own best friend.

Those are the lessons that made me now. Those are the lessons that taught me to be more independent as a women. Those are also my key for my own future. Something that I won't get from anywhere but from you, Mommy.

So, Happy Birthday, Mommy. I still want you to stay with me until you saw your own great grandchild from me. Because now, I want to learn to be a good mommy, just like you. :')

I know I'm not supposed to cry during fasting month, but what if I cried today because I love you, Mommy?

High High All The Way

2009-09-12T22:35:00.003+07:00

I'm all the way down down down to the deepest fragile moments. This week is my weakest point. I'm nearly drowned in my imaginations and fly up to the seventh sky. I'm almost fall so unconsciously; for the day took my soul away.

Everyday is a new beginning. But for me I don't give a damn of what the day has given to me. Nevertheless, I care better for what the sunlight took from me.

In my brute days, I don't care what others' laughing at. Ha ha ha, blah blah blah. My eyes are on their eyes and my dizzy head force me to exaggerate my smile. I tried harder but I never could. Somehow they knew what's going on with me and ask me out for a fresh air. I don't want fresh air. All I want is just a huge big bed that I'm craving for weeks and a large large pillow plus great foods and great friends around.

...In the jungle, the mighty jungle, the lion sleeps tonight
In the jungle, the quiet jungle, the lion sleeps tonight...

In my dreams, the lion is biting his nail and licking my cheek so gently. I wipe it all away and gently touch his fur. I dream about a place somewhere in this world where it's so green and the wind blows softly. I wasn't been so lucky with what I need. All these days, a cat replaces the lion, and campus' garden replaces the forest. Still I sit there wishing all my dreams come true and hoping that someday the lion wishes to sleep with me tonight.

Twirl and twirl I jump around the class, searching for that fresh air I'm looking for. I'm dancing. I'm a ballerina. She told me so. I twirl around and it feels so good. I can almost feel the wind breeze on my cheek. Whatever they say doesn't bother me at all. I love my life and everything that fits in it. And this is the time for my med.

I tried to sleep but I can't. I seek for happiness instead. I love the way I hug myself tightly holding myself up so that I will never fall. The love of my life is downstairs waiting for the bride. I am the bride. I am! So then I decided to walk through the aisle and search for him. He was busy. Maybe later.

I Promise

2009-09-12T17:22:00.002+07:00

I promise to be a good girl
I promise not to lie to everyone
I promise to learn to love
I promise not to hate people

But above all,
I am the biggest liar of all. >:)

告白

2009-09-08T11:04:00.002+07:00

僕も今感じなければならないのか分からない。
混乱混乱混乱
私は怒っているでしょうか？幸せになるでしょうか？

私は無料ですべきですか？私がここにあなたと一緒にですか？
時にはあなたは私にうんざりする
ので、私は誰かと一緒にいたい疲れ
しかし、私はあなたに愛する
だからこそ、私はあなたを残し決しての

Do You Wanna Know About Me? Oh Maybe You Don't But This Is Fun!

2009-09-08T09:12:00.003+07:00

GOOD MORNING!

GOOD DAY, PEOPLE!

Gosh it's 9 AM here and I'm already in campus by now. So boring. I was going to attend a meeting for Gelar Apresiasi Seni Teater Kolam today and by now I'm stuck with my classmate Rima. My first class today is Communication Strategy in Handling Crisis. EW. Sounds oh no no, to me. The lecturer is also the boring one, she successfully got me high and higher inside the dream world.

Yesterday I drew a few pics but I can't show it to you right now. S.E.C.R.E.T!
Naah, not that secret either but the truth is I kept it in my phone and I actually haven't Photoshopped it. LOL.

But anyway, it's been a very great week whole over. I enjoy being here because I get to meet my friends. :)

Anyway, here's some fact about me that you might wanna know. WAY weirder than what you think. Don't you? Don't you? Don't you wanna know this?

I'm a very shy person. (OK I KNOW YOU THINK THAT THIS IS SOO NOT TRUE) That's why I can't get along with a person that I don't think as weird as myself in just minutes. And that's also why I write beautifully because I can't speak beautifully and I also noticed that I am not that beautiful. People often mistaken for what I said, because I really can't create words that I'm about to speak. I think I'm more like the EMO blogger type who always write for whatever passed through out their minds. But I can assure you that Cappocchino is surely not an emo blog.
I'm a chameleon. I like doing all kinds of art and enjoying myself participating in the community. But I don't focus in just one art. I can also jump from one community to the other in just several months. That's why sometimes I hate the japanese lover who involve too much in that world. Because they always thought that they cute enough to wear the costumes and also cute enough to say '好き!'. I don't know how and why but I dislike everyone who's just too much in it.
I prefer cheeseburger plain. Because pickles and tomatoes are dislikeable. Too much of them will kill your sense of taste.
I used to think that I'm a bisexual which in fact I'm not! Believe it or not, I did thought of that. Because there are some times I'm amazed with the pretty girls just like boys are. But now I know that it's normal because most girls do too. And my Monkey seems a bit gay too because sometimes he adores handsome guys and telling me about it on and on.

Ooops! I think I got to go right now.

See you l8r 4 more info about moi! <3

How Am I This Lazy Lazy Saturday?

2009-09-05T16:29:00.004+07:00

Somehow I want to work in a media as a journalist. BIG media such as Kompas, SWA, Media Indonesia, or Tempo. But I think my words are suitable for columnist job. But still, I want to make writings as my full time job! It's going to be sooooooooo fun! I know I'm such a writing bitch but you know, there are dreams to fulfill too. I just have to find the nearest job right now because I'm already in the last term so I'm seeking for a work experience. And since I've been writing like CRAZY and draw like CRAZY too, I think I just have to expand my talent and my ability.

I've been applying to some advertising agencies but somehow I still don't get it. So the last struggle Imma get through with is showing this blog to my lecturer. I KNOW IT'S WEIRD! But you know, everybody gotta make a living and I think that's one of the way to it.

Monkey said that Mr. Teguh; my public relation writing lecturer that gave me an A for last term, might be interested in seeing my writing works. He said though this blog is soo shitty controversial, I have my own style. And maybe what he'll see from my writing is my style. But it's still a MAYBE.

Or maybe he'll thinks I'm inadequate?

Sometimes writing just drive me nuts. And today is a whole shitty day.

Today is a very shitty day. I got this External Relations 2 the eye-widening class on 8 o'clock with Ms. Onit. The lack of sleeping plus Onit's class (it's the type of lecturer that'll see right through your eyes when she talks) equals eyesore. What's more shittely shit is I sit in front of the class and in the place where my eyes are always available for her eyes. It's like, "Look into my eyes, Canti. And feel the pain slowly growing inside you." Dammit. Since then I just can't sleep.
The second class is with the booooooooring Mrs. Henny S. W. What's boring about her is because she always make our class separate in groups and then the groups have to answer her question. And she always hanging on us that our answers never seem quite right to her. 1 answer equals 30 minutes. But still I have to raise my hand a lot today because I wanna get noticed by them. What's wrong of being popular among the lecturers? I mean, in a more positive ways, such as, you're noticed for being active in the class. I find that useful for my own sake so why not?

OH GOSH AND STILL I HAVE 40 MORE MINUTES TO GO TO SIP ON MY DRINKS...

Boring Class Sketches 3

2009-09-05T15:34:00.002+07:00

This is Raissa Disa, my bestest friend in class. I draw this for her because she asked me to. I think it looks like her a lot, but she thinks not.

Here I show you her real pic.

So, what do you think?
:p

Quote This, Sister!

2009-09-05T15:12:00.001+07:00

PS: I don't care about what you think about me at all. I am ugly, so what? Not all of us born rich and beautiful like you guys are. Smoochies! :D

Boring Class Sketches 2

2009-09-04T21:09:00.004+07:00

Yesterday is a very boring day and I've got meetings to attend. So I decided to draw some sketches in Aji Sora's folder. Here you go! Enjoy!

This is Sora.

This is my beloved Monkey! It doesn't look like him but this is MONKEY! <3

I DISLIKE PINK

2009-09-04T20:52:00.004+07:00

I DON'T LIKE PINK.
I'm telling you once again, I DON'T LIKE PINK!
But my girls keep telling me that I love pink.
That is soo lie.

My hot pink iPod plus my Philips Bubbles pink earphone

My pink polka pencil case

My pink monkey paper map

My stripey pink floor mat

My pink sweeping tools

My pink broom

My pink MCKY shoes

My baby pink Crocs shoes

My rainbow + pink bath case

The Backstabbed Girls Survival Tips

2009-09-04T12:20:00.003+07:00

Good day, Boys and Girls!

Right now I want to give you some tips, some very important tips. This is dedicated to all the girls that's soo unwanted by their friends or their co-workers that the biatches talk about them behind their back. I didn't mean to say that the girls is so unwanted because of their annoying attitude. Maybe you're not that annoying. It's just, some people cannot appreciate or accept their behavior or the way they dressed.

Ladies and Gentlemen, we are all made of a little bit sweet and sour. ;)

Left Up - Right Down: Novira Kartika, Me, Dutti Kadarusman, Yuanita Wira, Nurfizny Ramdhani

Do you think that these girls like me for the way I am?

The answers are, maybe yes, and maybe not.

But they are all my high school best friends and we've been besties since years so hell yeah it's just so bullshit that they didn't like me. What you should know is, YES THEY DID TALK BEHIND MY BACK. But it's like years ago and they solve it like bestfriends should. The point is, you should be aware of the girls near you. Some girls just don't born nice, like me. But some girls are. These girls above used to talk behind my back. But since they're born as good girls and they still wanna be friends with me, they talked to me and tried to find the way out. So I changed my attitude, and they promised to tell me if they don't like me for some reasons. Since then, we were solid.

So do you think this describes what you feel right now? But hey, I ain't finish yet. Please answer the following questions to re-assure me that you really need my tips:

Do you know that they talk about you behind your back after somebody told you and not because you figure it out by yourself?
Do they play nice and fair but with fake face with you?
Did it happen for a very long time and still you think they don't stop?
Or do they really look nice that you thought of them as your best friends?
What I mean is, you don't know at all that they talk behind your back since they play it so smooth that you thought of them as your bestfriends but somebody told you all the details?

If the answers are YES, my opinion is, 'Why do you still wanna stick with them?' or 'Why bother yourself surrounded by people who don't like you the way you are?' Be strong, girls, because there are soo many fishes in the sea. (Yes, that phrase is also useful to best girls problemma)

I had this thing going on me before. I was on the freshman year in highschool. I have these girls that I THOUGHT accepted my inside weirdness. They look so nice and friendly to me that I love them so much. But in sometimes I feel something. I feel that they always put me in the last priority. I don't know how to describe it, but yeah it shows. Then one day, it really hurts me when one of them said to me that they hated me. For what reason? Come on, I always be their clown, making everybody feels happy when their down, so why? Why? And then those words just flew out of her lips.

"Because you are WEIRD. You dressed weird, you talk weird, you behave weird."

The girl who always say what say 'WHAT??'

OH-MY-GOD. So my best friends are that shallow?
Oh ok just so you know, I decided to focus on my dancing, finding other more smarter friends and not dumb enough to hate me for being weird.

Enough about that, these are my Survival Tips from The Very Mean Girls.

1. TO IGNORE

First thing to do. IGNORE THEM. Pretend like you're the coolest girl in town and nobody can get in your way. Ok I know it's very tempting to see their Facebook and search for something that related to you or anything that might be a clue. But seriously, if you're not strong enough or hard-hearted enough, you're going down, honey. Let's say what if they call you 'bitch' or 'that fucking girl' on their status updates? Will you be strong enough to laugh at it? If you're not, then forget it. Sometimes, not knowing what other says about you keeps you alive and strong.

2. TO STAY COOL

Do they show it to you finally? I mean, from their gestures and facial expressions? If they finally do that, JUST STAY COOL. I mean... REALLY COOL. Just pretend that you are the most popular girl in school. Say hi to everyone you know but just glance a bit smile at them. Show them that you don't really need them. It'll piss them off so bad that they will talk more about you. But hey, who cares? You don't need people that hazardous to you.

3. TO CONFRONT

If you already pass number 1 to number 2, then you're ready to step it up to the next level. Confront. This is the step where you're already hard enough that you don't feel brokenhearted anymore. It's the time to confront them and stay untouchable. Try to have a little nice chit chat and step the chit chat to the next level. You have to be more confidence in speaking words. Be bitchy. Don't show them that you know tthat they talk behind your back. But let me tell you, if you can manage to be the one who talks the most and look like you're having a better life without 'em, I'll say, 'You're HOT! Burn them, baby, burn!' XOXO

4. GET EVEN

Ok girls, this is the last step that I don't recommend you to do. Unless, you are born evil like me.
But I still wanna tell you why you should do this. They were being harsh, evil, even bitchy to you. So why can't you do that to them too? They deserve it don't they?
Let me tell you something, I've been working on revenges since I was in the kindergarten. My friend invited everybody to her birthday but me. Gosh! Little kids can be so cruel, you know! So I decided to gave her a bit surprise surprise. I stole all of her stationaries and throw them out from the school's balcony. She cried, and that amuse me. Since then, I've been doing a lot of criminal acts. One of my first grade bestie was being such a meanie? I hid her english book so that the teacher get mad at her and threw her out of the class. My junior high bestie was being a bitch? I hid all of her 2nd grade book in the school's attic so that she cried and confused for like months.
But are you really ready to do this?
Because it's only an option and if you really wanna do this you have to do it sophisticately. The key is, don't let them know that it's you. This is for your own amusement and not to let the world know that you're such a bad bad girl. There's no point of it.

Well girls, whatever you do, remember this:

ENJOY!

XOXOXOXO

Boring Class Sketches 1

2009-09-02T19:28:00.004+07:00

Today's class is soo boring. But thank God I have the ability to amuse myself wif drawings. Here are the boring class sketches of today.

This is my beloved Sari Rahayu. She asked me to draw her.

And this is the heart broken bear

Tweetphoria

2009-09-02T10:21:00.003+07:00

OMG OMG OMG, now I'm kinda addicted to Twitter. I think I just taste my own saliva by saying this ewwww. I don't want to admit it but to tell you the truth, I already posted like 2598 tweets since like 3 months! HARGH. Ok, girl now I want you to say it! SAY IT!

'Hi my name is Canti Widyadhari and I'm not smarter enough than Twitter.'

Err... Maybe not that one...

OKAY I'M ADDICTED TO TWITTER!! SATISFIED???

That's more like it.

Gosh I wish I wasn't, really. But somehow I get to taste what-so-called TWEETPHORIA by activating my tweets each day and each hour. My best big ol bestie which is soo sexy (LOL) called Sari Rahayu a.k.a Aiey, Sexzoy, Crunchy (HAHAHAHHA) is the one who use it first. She told me the fun of it which I've told you before on my older post. Okay I did follow Miley Cyrus but still she never replied to my messages. So there's no fun out of it. But I get to see the fun when I can share my stories in terms of microblogging. Microblogging is an activity of sharing your stories only in 140 characters. Unlike the real blogging that force you to write full article about what you wanna write, microblogging is soo simple that you wanna type more and more from your phone. That's why I'm addicted. Because I am so... mobile. LMAO

But since I have no Miley Cyrus replying on me, I followed Demi Lovato and Selena Gomez too.
Pocchi's such a teenage, Pocchi's such a teenage, nyaw nyaw nyaw
She likes Hannah Montana, Miley and Selena, nyaw nyaw nyaw
And again, they never replied meeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!
On and on I get soo desperate that I'm able to pick up again and follow adults. Woops, adultsy! Not like you think it is, DUH. What I mean by adult is friends of my adult friends such as Nindha, Uns, etc etc. I get to see where the fun is because their tweets are so inspiring. You know, the kind of world where you're going to enter right after leaving university life. And I'm more than eager to know what's up next. Thankfully, they responded to me (FINALLY) so I don't have to be more than desperado for Twitter.

Another thing, I also use that microblogging tool to blab, chittychat, and also to tell the whole world about what's hot and what's not. I do gossips with my classmates, and of course, talking about others behind their back. Well, not particularly 'behind' because yeah you get to see what tweets that I send to my girls.

So Twitter equals FUN.

But the more fun is, my favorite shoewear brand named Crocs; yeah, I DO got 5 pairs of Crocs worth more than millions if I sell them back, FOLLOWED ME BACK! WOHOOOO. THEY EVEN RESPOND TO ME WHEN I TOLD THEM ABOUT INDONESIAN FAKE CROCS!

F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-FUUUUNNNNN!!

Felicita Widya Nugrahaning

2009-09-02T10:14:00.002+07:00

Oh I forgot.

This is Felicita Widya Nugrahaning a.k.a Poypoy, Yopyop, Poyaa, Ratu Kelabang, etc etc's blog.

http://feliipoyaa.blogspot.com

Maybe she write about the Va-Va Voom.
Whatever, check that out, bitchies.

First Day of Fifth Semester Including Cat Fights. XOXO

2009-09-01T19:55:00.003+07:00

Today is our first day in school. Just like any other day we started it with some kiss and hugs and everything nice by saying 'Oh I miss you so!' though you might not wanna see them again. But somehow everything's going so well today and me likey likey.
Again, I MEET KECES!

I MISS YOU GUYS SOO MUCH! XOXOXOXO

Hahahaha. Finally I get to see the ten gossip girls that I LOVE SO MUCHO.
We talked and chat with kisses and hugs in the class, again and again make the lecturer; Mrs. Emmy who had 7 grandchilds, 2 in USA, 1 in Manila, 4 in Jakarta and ever get to meet Hillary Clinton live and shake her hand, mad and often shoos us. Even I didn't get to know what Mrs. Emmy wants. I'm focusing with the girls. :)

Anyway, we might not have the latest issue around, yet we still talked some of the old gossips with a bit of spicy cream, but I love it! Because I get to hear what I haven't hear so far. The latest truth about the Va-Va Voom Vitch from the last post that I've told y'all before. (Hey, I forgave her okay it's just nothing wrong with a bit of truth exposure right?)

This is Felicita Widya Nugrahaning, also known as Poypoy, Yopyop, Poyaa etc etc.

Errrr the left one is Natalia Putrie Tampubolon, Queen of Stupidity and Shameful Behavior LOL

Well she used to be bestfriended with Va-Va-Voom. But as I told you before, she's a really nice girl nowadays so there's no reason to mock her around. And she told us just how and why she gotten less closer than before with Va-Va. She thinks they're doing just fine but I think Va-Va thought that they're not like what they used to be. That's why she's like jealous of us. Hell yeah, we won't hang out with Va-Va. I mean, I like her but some of the girls here just NOT. So why bother forcing ourselfs? We like Poypoy so we hang out with her. That's that simple.

Now I'm really really confuse. That Va-Va-Voom Vitch just post something not cool out of her Twitter.

I chat with Poypoy and she told me that 'perhaps' it's directed to her.

'Cieeeee yg udh nemu tmn sejati, caelaaaaaah KAMPUNG!!!'

The tweet up there seems to be a reply to this tweet:

'slesai kuliah foto2 di dpan mbrc ama @sarirahayu @pocchinko @raissadisa @karinamyusha @putritampubolon @adelioayamo, genti, rachel, nadia'

This is the pic that we took today! Sorry, low resolution.

'slesai foto pindah k takor,bergosip2 kecil.. NGABUBURIT : gossip kecil d takor with @pocchinko @sarirahayu @adelioayamo @putritampubolon'

Was it? Or was it not?

So I told Poypoy to ask her directly to whom it for.

This is the result:

'elahh elahh.. puasa2 marah.. syapa deh itu?? > : Cieeeee yg udh nemu tmn sejati, caelaaaaaah KAMPUNG!!'

OOOOOHHHHHH CRISPY!

The cat fight is ON, Ladies and Gentlemen

Omar Abdul

2009-08-31T19:33:00.004+07:00

The Infamous Omar Abdul

Dear Bloggerrifics,

Wow, it's been a very long time since I'm telling you stories. As a matter of fact, I DID tell stories. It's just in a more harsh way and very grapevine-ish about someone's sins and make it even bigger. Sorry, Marshanda.

I'm in campus right now, waiting for my Monkey. That is just why I've got nothing to do and to tell you the truth, I miss being a storyteller.

My object for storytelling right now is my good friend Omar Abdul or so known as Omar Annas yeah whatever suits your pronunciation.
He recently entered Atma Jaya University and successfully leave the 'highschool' title behind. His biggest passion is Photography and he makes good photographs for my SORE Y Las Familias organization. He's good at capturing candid photos, also good for a pre-wedding pictures.

Here is some of his best-est masterpieces.

And yet there's still lots.

These are some of the pics he took during our work for SORE Y Las Familias Concert.

This is me! Can you believe it?

We're on the hottest club in town. Aksara bookstore.

Sore's biggest fan; Daffa

Ramondo Gascaro

Naughty Duo

Awan Garnida Kartadinata

Maharani Putri Wulandari

Left - Right: Monkey, Me, Daffa, Jessica, Tasha

Monkey wears no panty

Left - Right: Jessica, Tasha (behind), Mirzal (behind the door), Me (frontline), Iqbal (behind), Rani, Daffa, Ariana

I really like the way Omar took his picture. Sometimes he can create something out of nothing. But the most important is, don't tell this straight to his face. Because he can get his head big in no time. Well, I might show this article to him either. He'll know it in some ways.

Marshanda and Adinda, Confirmed

2009-08-29T04:01:00.002+07:00

Hello guys!
Did you find yourself enjoying this video?

'Lagu ini kayaknya paling cocok buat temen-temen gue, yang musuhin gue waktu gue SD, gue gak punya temen, gue struggle di sekolah gue sendiri. Yang jahat-jahat!
Adinda Mutiara Sabila Purnomosidi
MAKAN NIH! dan semua temen-temen lo yang ngikutin lo.
Gue tau lo ketua, lo apa, gila lo, lo paling jago dari kelas satu sampe kelas enam lo rangking satu terus.
Wuuuuu mantap selamat ya!
Lo add gue di facebook, gue approve lo, men!'

Well if you enjoy it, then I bet you heard those names that she called during the show. One of them is my junior high school good friend, Adinda Mutiara Sabila. I admit it, she's such a real smart girl with a great attitude. I actually find myself like her a lot. And what I thought about her after finding this video isn't change at all.

Luckily, I get to interview Adinda tonight and ask her opinion about this video. She admit that she shocked about the video and the news around her. She found herself lucky that she got lots of things to do in Singapore that she doesn't have to worry about what Marshanda said about her. 'I thought we were okay and nothing went wrong between us.' she said. Well, Adinda, I think Marshanda doesn't think that way. Cempaka Kaulika, Adinda's best friend admit that when Marshanda met Adinda on 2009's Java Jazz, they seem to get along well and talk nicely to each other. 'Yes, I thought so too.' Adinda added. I asked her another question about her famous friend. Is she really one of the elementary school's public enemy? 'She's actually doing just fine during first grade to fifth grade. But after that, she's just... change.' she answered. From those points, I finally made a conclusion. Adinda really confirmed to me that she doesn't hate Marshanda and of course she didn't do anything to her on elementary school.

Maybe Marshanda just doesn't think about her that way?
Or is she really need a special attention?

Or maybe, she's just another child star that falls into pieces

THIS VIDEO IS CITRUS

2009-08-29T03:50:00.002+07:00

HIGHLY RECOMMENDED VIDEO!
for those who's tired of their life and need some retarded new beginning.

OK so this video is actually a plastic surgery between Ronald McDonald & Orangeman; a Japanese Anime character. This character is too weird to be true that you can find the stupidest and wackiest footage of Orangeman in Youtube. I really find myself in harmony watching this video. On the floor; rolling.

Weird Photos 1

2009-08-29T03:44:00.001+07:00

Highschool's Wall of Shame

A Night With An Old Bestfriend

2009-08-29T02:58:00.002+07:00

Today I'm having a sleepover with my highschool bestie, Novira Kartika Mayangsari. Aaand to tell you the truth, it was a load of fun! We get to talk heart-to-heart with each other, and perhaps, get to know each other more after I silenced myself for her for like months.

I remember clearly what it's all about.

She used to has this crush on a boy named Agidio Satrio Nugroho which is one of my past bestfriend. I know what he was like and I certainly not sure if he's the right one for her. It's because I cared too much about her that I don't want her to be heartbroken again thanks to him. He's been not there when she needed him and even worse, he dated someone else so quickly. So then after that I banned him from my life.
But now he's back again and beg her to be his loved one. I am so not disagree.
So I decided to tell her nothing ever again and be silence for months.

After months passed, she decided to make things better for both of us. She clearly shows how much she loves him and how much she would give for him. But at the same time, she cannot ignore my unaccepted perception. So she told me all of the things that I've missed. All those details that at first I don't want to hear.

But after tonight, I finally find happiness in her. I realize that it is her own way to seek for happiness. So I decided to support her in any way. If she really loves that men, than so be it. All that I should do is just being her very own best friend that supports her no matter what and never judge her from just what I saw.

Dear Bestie, I really wish that you're happy with him. If he's the right choice for you, then just stick with him, ok? :)

But if he hurts you, please don't hesitate to come to me.
I'll make him crawl to you again if it's needed. >:)

Kitty Love

2009-08-29T01:52:00.002+07:00

Hello!
I'm bored with facebook, twitter, and etc so I decided to search for something nice in Youtube.
And this is what I got.

This is a TOTALLY WEIRD song from a user name Mean Kitty. What the fuck?
But seriously hilariously I laugh the whole time watching this!

Enjoy!

Marriage is On The Way!

2009-08-22T02:54:00.004+07:00

Hello yellow! How are you, people? Doin' alrite?

Anyway I would like to tell you something. A little bit pouring my heart out actually.

Again and again i want to tell you that I love Monkey so much. He's been my very best friend, a lover, a brother, even a father to me. My family is very much free so they don't control me as much as they did once I get into highschool. And now I'm in university. Even free-er than before. So since they aren't around me to either control me or to take care of me, Monkey replace their duties. That's why I hanging on with him because he's been my EVERYTHING. Argh I knooooww it's too much and it's kinda boring for you to hear but yeah he's my world! What am I supposed to do?

Anyway again, that's not the real point. The REAL point is, if I wanna marry him then I should wear hijab. OMG. I rarely pray so now I have to wear hijab? Superb. But that's what I should take. It's been a tradition in his family so I have to take it as it is. Also, it's a form of my commitment with him. What do you think? Should I? Or should I not?

Macbook

2009-08-22T02:07:00.004+07:00

Seriously I can't sleep! It's been 2 hours online-ing on my uncle's Mac and still can't go to bed. Maybe I'm just too excited for tomorrow, but still it's a maybe. Okay, now I really really IN LOVE WITH THIS MACBOOK! I want to get this stuff for my birthday but seriously, this baby is just too expensive. And the one who's gonna bought this baby is my uncle, not my parents. URRRGHH, I'm craving! x(

OOOOOOHHHH... Here kitty, kitty, kitty... Come to mama... RRRAWWWRRRRRRRR

There are several things why I loove Mac better than Windows.

Less virus
Great speaker & microphone
Great design
Better for music producing and art designing
Better internet connection
ETC ETC oh gosh there's too much in my mind I can't tell

Anyway, now you know so GET ME ONE! Lol lol

First Day of Ramadhan

2009-08-22T00:32:00.002+07:00

Happy Ramadhan, Boys and Girls!

Please forgive me for all my sins and of course talking about you guys behind your back. But that's entertaining don't you think? Let's not ruin the show shall we?

XOXOXO, I <3 YOU ALL

Hello Campus Life!

2009-08-20T12:19:00.002+07:00

Wow, I just can't imagine that it's been 3 MONTHS OF HOLIDAYS!

I really really miss all my campus friends. We've been separated for a very long time and now it's time for us to meet again and cherish our friendship for the last year in campus.

Today I meet the Va-Va-Voom that I talked about several months before. She's here right now, yet not beside me but yeah she's here in our campus as well. She's talking nice to me today so I think, okay I've been hating her for months well maybe I should stop. Monkey taught me how to love and how to forgive. And he wants me to use it well. Yes, I forgive her and I also wanna say sorry for everything that I wrote about her. It takes courage to say hello to your enemy again and praise them. And she did it well. She told me how skinny I am and how she's been jealous of me. (FYI, of course you know most girls wanna be skinny. I'm not most girls you know. Blessed to have this never ending boney figure.)

Okay, so today I walk around my campus block, meeting some friends, and did hug them or kiss them because I miss them sooo bad! I guess this term is going to be just fine. :)

Melon

2009-08-19T18:33:00.001+07:00

Humpty Dumpty

2009-08-19T18:06:00.001+07:00

Rainbow Eyes

2009-08-19T18:01:00.001+07:00

The Weird Duck

2009-08-19T17:43:00.001+07:00

The Weird Forest

2009-08-19T17:30:00.001+07:00

Canti's Photograph

2009-08-19T16:44:00.002+07:00

New UI Student Blog

2009-08-19T15:23:00.005+07:00

ooohh wew, it's been years since i log in from web!

i feel GRRREEEAAAATTT!!

but oh when i logged in today in my school's hotspot, the first page told me that now every UI student can have their own UI blog! sound's fun 'aaite? but wait, it's really deceiving. because now UI is having some kind of joint with wordpress.com which makes it sounds 'ooooohh... i better use my own blog then.' because nothing really makes it special! it's a WORDPRESS hellooo? argh argh.

Poor Speidi!

2009-07-07T09:40:00.003+07:00

Hello, boys and girls.
Meet Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag

They are one of the most romantic or maybe ANNOYING celebrity couple in Hollywood. What made them famous is when they started to play in The Hills, one of Gossip-Girl-kind-of reality-show-which-I'm-not-very-much-interested but hey, they successfully showed their romance to public from that show. Anyway, I really-really hate them because of what I read in Go Girl! that they hired paparazzi to take their pictures so that they will get the fame and fortune, geez what a wanna-be!

Newsflash, they were playing some reality show next after The Hills which called I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here!. Simple game, Survivor thingy, but of course this was more difficult because the crew of the show really wanna knock you down. Because you're the celebrity. And they need fun slapstick show for the audience. Moreover, this Spencer Brat and Heidi Botag is too snob for the show. Or should I say, too celeb-y that they can't stand every single day on that show.

Here's what they got.

From this:

To this:

From this:

To this:

And here's another shot from the show:

Here's what Spencer said on the snapshot above, which captured on E! News
(I saw it myself and I'm like, no way!)

"Speidi doesn't belong here, Speidi belongs in L.A. where the paparazzi is."

Ha! SNOBBISH!

And they are the first one to quit that show! Not because they were eliminated, but because they really quit with capitals. Q-U-I-T. Such lame quitters. And I heard on E! News too that they're begging to be on that show again. I guess 2nd chance is not the right option for them.

Google-ing

2009-07-07T09:26:00.002+07:00

I just searched my own name in Google (Canti).
And the result is not quite disappointing but hardly amusing too. It's some kind of something artsy, wine, and everything nice.

How about Google my other name? (Canti Widyadhari)
VERY delightful because I can see my own thing all over the googly-goo. :D

How about Google my other other name? (Pocchi)
You will see all kinds of site for dogs.
Or maybe, some people who have the same nickname.
But still, dogs.

Happy End

2009-06-23T01:45:00.001+07:00

No we're not done at all! We're still the lovebirds kind of Spencer-Heidi kinda type and we're still going strong! Yaaaay!

. . .

2009-06-22T00:52:00.001+07:00

Dear Melon,

I guess we're done.. :'(

----  Sent using a Sony Ericsson mobile phone

I Really Wish That It's Not The End

2009-06-22T00:17:00.001+07:00

Dear Melon,

Monkey doesn't want to pick up the phone.. I'm starting to getting on my nerves. I think I hurt him that bad.. :'(

What am I supposed to do? It's like I said, there's no turning back. Right now I'm listening to Ekdahl's and crying like a baby.
Really wish you were here, sigh.. I'm feeling so lonely right now.. One of my guardian has just fallen off and to think that he might not coming back is really frustrating me..

Do you think I deserve a second chance?

PS: Lemon is coming here evvveryday. Think she miss you too. Because she's here all day. Let's just hope that I won't ended up like her :')

Love, Pocchi

----  Sent using a Sony Ericsson mobile phone

Lips Are Zipped

2009-06-21T23:45:00.001+07:00

Dear Melon,
One thing I learned today is that I can't share all my thoughts with someone. Because my thoughts are too evil, too dangerous, and too uncomfortable for that someone. I have to learn to close the door; keeping some of them only to myself. Like what I did today, I shared my thoughts with Monkey and it's not acceptable for him. I made him cry and I'm feeling guilty 'til now. And it seems like there's no turning back. I'm just too not healthy for him and he's just too good for me.
Maybe I need to learn what my friend Shida did, speaking with my lips closed.

Melon, I'm tired of crying.. Please come home I really miss you.. :'(

----  Sent using a Sony Ericsson mobile phone

Cappocchino

formspring.me

formspring.me

With Rain at The Goods Dept

Please, Baby.

Sparks

RACOONS! what dya think bout them?

Hello La Senza

RACCOONS

Haven't updated my blog for months and suddenly new followers?

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For Those Who Feel Like Going Down The Hill

The Top Of The Pyramid

This Is Just A Typical Crossroads You'll Find All The Time

Home, Love, Family. There Was Once A Time I Must Have Had Them Too.

Red Eyes

What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up?

Goldilocks (Part 1: Logo)

Yeah, Push It! Push It Real Good!

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KECES and Surprise Tradition

Missing College Life That Soon To Be Over On 2010

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Grace Sitorus' Version of Libra and Scorpio

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Ineedmyholiday

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Giraffe Love

1960s

New New Haircut

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Hey Sir, I Just Wanna Tell You How Fucking Pathetic You Are

Comic Con!

Me and My Imagination, You and Your Ego.

Gizi Tinggi Makanan Mahasiswa

I Love You, Girl!

Imaginary Friend

Reckless

Very Well

Squids Gone Mad

My Favorite Happy Birthdays

Sari Rahayu dear canti widyadhari,pertama2 gw ngga rela umur lo masi 19 taun! kedua gw berharap lo makinmeninggi dgn kadar body yg makin montok depan nya HAHA, yg terakhir"HAPPY BORNDAY 19th" and many happy wishes for youuuuuuuuu! woff you :)

Raysha Primita halo sayang yang sekarang tambah tua heheh happy birthday love !best wishes for you. have a great one dear.muuaahhhhh :)

Mufli El POCAYYY.. hepi birthday yooo..haha semoga makin sukses ya pocch..24 september memang tgl yang paling oke ya gk.ehhee

Vina Angelina Prasetyo pochi selamat ulang tahun...ayo yg rajin menggambarnya yaaa..be blessed!

Dicky Irchamsyah pocay! happy bday wish u all the best! semoga diberi kekuatan dan kesabaran mengarungi kehidupan yang fana ini...haha...okaay!

Abdullah Ghifari Al-Attas POOCH, happy birthday and have a great day! :)jangan lupa traktir hehebest wishes for you, girl!

Ade Firza Paloh Pochiii met ultah yeee..cepet besarlah kau nak..take life easily and smile thru all the perils in life..hayo gambar lagi, kalo ngewarnain jangan keluar garis ya hehehehe..

Noni Hannisa Fajnur happy b'day little pochi..enak ya br 19thn..jd sebel nih udh 20..heheheheeeeHAPPY B'DAY dear,wish you all the best ya poch..=)

Dyah Ayunico Ramadhani Have a super duper great year birthday girl!Life's no different with a sketchboard. How we draw our life story is within our full authority! draw it well honey ♥

Adinda Mutiara Sabila happy birthday sayaang! stay cute and adorable and squishy and lovable and and and when the need arises, sexy! ♥ ♥ masih dance gak?

Hamada Ahmad Abdool Adek pocita, Happy belated b'day! Wish u always all the best.. Keep on being the unique you!19 taun ya? Aaarghh msh kcil bngeeett..ngiri...God bless

Aji Sora SELAMAT DAN SUKSES SELALU

Muhamad Robbyansyah TAHUN ULANG KOK SELAMAT? ULANGAN TENGAH TAHUN SELAMATAN?selamat ulangan akhir tahun#robs

Ananta Pramahastar selamat ulang taun kawan...smoga cepat lulus seperti pacarmu itutolong traktir saya di depan pendulum

Novira Kartika Mayangsari HAPPY BIRTHDAY CANTI! YEAAAY FINALLY 19 y.o.how is it feels? hehe :)wish you all the best! :D

Resatio Adi Putra selamat ulg tahun ke 23

Rose

19

I CAN SING, GUYS! Hear me!

Cat Dog Girl & A Vampire

Nadia

Gelar Apresiasi Seni Teater Kolam 3 - Creative Open Recruitment

Idul Fitri Moments

Happy Ied!

Facebook. REACTIVATED!

Esther

Ramadhan 2009

Orphan

Song For Our Duet: You Are The Sunshine Of My Life by Stevie Wonder

I Should Stop Doing This

The Dog Girl

Facebook. DEACTIVATED!

Yesterday All My Troubles Seems So Far Away And Yet They Stayed All Day

ANGER

Happy Birthday Grandma!

High High All The Way

Sari Rahayu dear canti widyadhari,
pertama2 gw ngga rela umur lo masi 19 taun! kedua gw berharap lo makinmeninggi dgn kadar body yg makin montok depan nya HAHA, yg terakhir"HAPPY BORNDAY 19th" and many happy wishes for youuuuuuuuu! woff you :)

Raysha Primita halo sayang yang sekarang tambah tua heheh happy birthday love !
best wishes for you. have a great one dear.
muuaahhhhh :)

Mufli El POCAYYY.. hepi birthday yooo..
haha semoga makin sukses ya pocch..

24 september memang tgl yang paling oke ya gk.ehhee

Abdullah Ghifari Al-Attas POOCH, happy birthday and have a great day! :)
jangan lupa traktir hehe

best wishes for you, girl!

Noni Hannisa Fajnur happy b'day little pochi..enak ya br 19thn..jd sebel nih udh 20..heheheheeee
HAPPY B'DAY dear,wish you all the best ya poch..=)

Dyah Ayunico Ramadhani Have a super duper great year birthday girl!
Life's no different with a sketchboard. How we draw our life story is within our full authority! draw it well honey ♥

Hamada Ahmad Abdool Adek pocita, Happy belated b'day! Wish u always all the best.. Keep on being the unique you!
19 taun ya? Aaarghh msh kcil bngeeett..ngiri...
God bless

Muhamad Robbyansyah TAHUN ULANG KOK SELAMAT? ULANGAN TENGAH TAHUN SELAMATAN?

selamat ulangan akhir tahun
#robs

Ananta Pramahastar selamat ulang taun kawan...
smoga cepat lulus seperti pacarmu itu

tolong traktir saya di depan pendulum

Novira Kartika Mayangsari HAPPY BIRTHDAY CANTI! YEAAAY FINALLY 19 y.o.
how is it feels? hehe :)
wish you all the best! :D